The Brothers Solomon (2007)
John Solomon: I literally can not wait to feel myself inside you!
Janine: Woah! The only thing you're going to feel yourself inside of is a cold Dixie cup.
Dean Solomon: Well that certainly doesn't make your vagina sound very appealing.
John Solomon: So she got hit by a bus, huh? Poor girl.
Dean Solomon: Yeah, the bus took a pretty serious hit too. I mean she was a large girl. Comfortably in the 200's.
John Solomon: I think we maybe need to broaden our search to include less conventional methods of having a baby.
Dean Solomon: Like anal?
John Solomon: Do you have any pictures of the kids? Something that we can...
[points to picture of adoption agency representative's son]
John Solomon: Oh, Dean. How about that little guy?
Dean Solomon: No friggin' way! Under no circumstances. He's got like Bells Palsy or something.
Dean Solomon: So... you're a janitor?
James: That's right. I'm a black man so I must be a janitor. Motherfucking racist-ass stereotyper.
Dean Solomon: It's just, you're... wearing a janitor's outfit.
James: Oh. So a black man can't just go in a thrift shop and buy a janitor's outfit 'cause he find it comfortable on his nuts.
Dean Solomon: No, he can. Especially a black man.
John Solomon: What do you do?
James: I'm a janitor.
Dean Solomon: She's not into you. Can't you see that?
John Solomon: You're just jealous of what we have.
Dean Solomon: Jealous of what you have? I already have what you have: nothing.
John Solomon: Hope your baby doesn't die!
Dean Solomon: Guard your baby with your life!
James: Don't fuck up.
Dean Solomon: I gotta be honest, Erica. I'm really feeling a connection here. I mean, you're beautiful, impeccable dresser... great personality, nice hair, fat, great smile, smell good. Have you ever heard of the phrase "More cushion for the pushin"'?
Erica: Yeah, why?
Dean Solomon: Because you got it, lady.