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Lady Magdalene's (2008)

In this action comedy, Jack Goldwater, an IRS agent on loan to the Federal Air Marshal Service, is relieved of field duty after insulting a powerful U.S. Senator, and finds himself exiled ... See full summary »



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Cast overview, first billed only:
Lady Magdalene / Maggie, Singer
Ethan Keogh ...
Jack Goldwater
Claudia Lynx ...
Yassin Salem
The Director & FBI SAC Broderick
Gamal Hosny
Nurse Gretchen
IRS Agent Lewis Heinlein
Hope McBane ...
Michele Redmond ...
Keyaria Rodriguez ...
Angela Rosiek ...
Senator Red Kensington
Ron Czechorosky ...
Mark Allred


In this action comedy, Jack Goldwater, an IRS agent on loan to the Federal Air Marshal Service, is relieved of field duty after insulting a powerful U.S. Senator, and finds himself exiled to a humiliating desk job in Nevada as the federal receiver managing a legal brothel in tax default, where -- with the help of the brothel Madam, Lady Magdalene -- he uncovers an Al Qaeda plot to unload a nuclear-bomb-sized crate at Hoover Dam. Written by J. Neil Schulman

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis


The first no-strings-attached black comedy of the War on Terror. See more »

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Release Date:

22 October 2011 (USA)  »

Box Office


$525,000 (estimated)

Company Credits

Production Co:

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Technical Specs


| (2009 cut)


Aspect Ratio:

1.78 : 1
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Did You Know?


On a Sunday when the FBI building in Las Vegas was closed, Schulman drove onto an empty parking lot attempting to film a plaque outside the building honoring FBI agents. Schulman and an associate producer were detained for over two hours in the FBI parking lot, and the camera's tape and memory card were erased before it was returned. See more »


The Director: Some of my best enemies are Jewish.
See more »


Rahab the Harlot
Written by J. Neil Schulman
Performed by Nichelle Nichols
See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

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User Reviews

Bowel Troubles
7 July 2015 | by (United Kingdom) – See all my reviews

J. Neil Schulman, I ask you....why? Why would you do this, to yourself, your family, your cast and crew? Film is forever. And so is shame.

While I enjoyed this grade-school level trainwreck for what it was, questions remain after the laughter has ended. It's easy to enjoy the work of incredibly inept productions like these, that's why shows like Mystery Science Theater existed. Everyone loves to laugh and mock films which are so bad that you cannot hold back the inevitable giggles. But then you are left with questions like...why? How? Where did they money come from? (not that this had much of a budget).

Did these people honestly believe they were producing something worth seeing? How did they keep the cast and crew on the set after they realized what a tragic mistake they'd made? Were there armed guards keeping them from fleeing? Or even more troubling, did they really not know? As odd as that sounds, it is probably true. They honestly had no idea they were making a film whose only niche was to be the subject of mockery?! Can anyone be that brutally unaware? The director/writer/producers...sure. That happens a lot when those without any skill or talent attempt to make a film. But what about everyone else on the set? Is delusion contagious? Please, watch the Youtube version on the directors channel. You'll squeal with delight at the strange opening sequence in which they are literally trying to sell you some sort of herbal product.

Of all the bad films I've reviewed here, this one has a very special place in my heart. It is the worst, of the worst. It sets a new standard by which all truly pathetic films will be judged in the future. This film, makes Manos: The Hands of Fate seem like a brilliant production.

The buffet song at the end is classic. How they were able to fill every position in this film with people as inept as themselves is sort of an accomplishment, I suppose. Right down to the music, wardrobe, DP, everything! There is honestly not a single element within this stool-sample of a film which works, and is at anywhere even approaching a professional level. Actually, it's not really even at the level of a poorly-funded independent film made by moderately advanced 1st-year students either. It's about what you'd expect from someone with no film production background, who just happens to own a camera, and has great motivation to produce a film, despite not really knowing how. That about sums it up. There are kids, who aren't even film students yet, who produce work of substantially higher quality.

Did he honestly and legitimately feel that an audience would watch his masterpiece and be awed? Or at the very least...take it seriously? That alone, says a great deal.

See this film! If for no reason other than to reinforce your desire to never be as comically out-of-touch, delusional, and shockingly inept as the person/s behind this "film". This film might be entertaining in a "point and giggle" sort of way, but its real value, is as a stern warning to others.

5 of 7 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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