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"Undergrads" New Friends (TV Episode 2001) Poster

(TV Series)

(2001)

Quotes

[Mump has been stricken with carpal tunnel syndrome]

Doctor: What the hell were you guys doing?

Gimpy: Hacking into the Ben and Jerry's mainframe and changing Captain Kirk Crunch to Chocolate Chip Chewbacca.

Doctor: ...Right.

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Spud: Where is your Yoda now Gimpy? Shmuh.

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Rocko: Sweetass! It looks like I'm jerkin' my gerkin'.

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Gimpy: Don't you realize this is Star Wars vs Star Trek? A band of rebel X-Wing fighters versus... I don't know, some Star Trek crap where they save a bunch of crap lousy whales.

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Gimpy: Now, your joystick...

Rocko: Hawhaaaahawhawhaa.

Gimpy: Is there something funny about your joystick, Private Rocko? As I was saying, your joystick must be harnessed as the instruments of digital devastation. You must master your joystick like a fisherman masters bait.

Rocko: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[Doubles over]

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Gimpy: [opens a bathroom stall revealing Cal and a joystick] Private Cal! What is your major malfunction?

Cal: Heyy guyy. I'm mastering my joystick! slurpp

[Gimpy backs slowly out of the room]

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Cal: Sorry guy! I didn't know it was your birthday. Happy birthday, guy!

Gimpy: Cal, show Nitz Captain Joystick.

Cal: Ok guy. Meet my joystick. I named him Captain Joystick.

Gimpy: It's your birthday present which we were gonna give you at your party tomorrow night!

Cal: Oh no guy, that's *my* joystick! I'm using it tomorrow night and... oh wait, I see what you're doing! Slrp. You're trickin Nitz! I don't think Nitz will go for it, guy.

Rocko: I don't know, Nitz is kinda dumb sometimes. Maybe he'll fall for it.

Nitz: I'm logging off now.

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Rocko: Punk-ass! Take that, bastard!

[fighting noises]

Nitz: Are you OK?

Rocko: Yeah. I just saw Fight Club 22 times so I've started my own group, which I call Brawl Group. Wanna join? You can be member number 2.

[to himself]

Rocko: Number 2. Heh-heh that's not funny, eat this!

[punches himself]

Rocko: You're weak! No *you're* weak! I'm weaker than you, I mean I'm stronger!

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Rocko: Man. What died and crawled up his ass?

Cal: Maybe he borrowed my gerbil?

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Jessie: So, is this how you hang out with your high school friends? Just sit around and state?

Nitz: Only on Stare-day.

Jessie: [chuckles] Good one. We have signs of life.

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[Nitz, Jessie, Rob Brody and friends at a private movie screening]

Rob Brody: Look, you can see the boom shadow. And in this scene, that guy has his watch on. But look, now he doesn't. You see? Continuity error! Continuity error!

[Jessie groans]

Rob Brody: NUMBAH ONE! NUMBAH ONE! I WATCH THA MOVIE GOOD!

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Spud: No. This can't be. I'm supposed to be Number 1.

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Spud: Choose your weapon on the field of honor!

Gimpy: Broadswords! Huzzah!

[Spud and Gimpy are given broadswords, but find them too heavy to duel with]

Spud: What say revolvers, hmm?

[Spud and Gimpy are given revolvers, try to duel with them like swords, and find them too heavy as well]

Gimpy: Or, uh, karaoke duel!

[takes up microphone and starts singing a Thompson Twins song]

Gimpy: Oh-oo-oh hold me now!

[is unable to keep lifting microphone and drops it]

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[Rob Brody is lecturing Crougar on modern cinema]

Rob Brody: Look into the light, Crougar. What Bob is trying to do with overlapping audio in Nashville, M*A*S*H, and to a lesser extent in Short Cuts, is...

Crougar: [interrupting] F**k you, Brody. When the f**k did Robert Altman become "Bob?" Before or after he f***ed your mother?

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[Toking up in the projector room, oblivious to the fact that he's set fire to the film reels]

Crougar: This is some good shit!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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