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"SpongeBob SquarePants" MuscleBob BuffPants/Squidward the Unfriendly Ghost (TV Episode 1999) Poster

Quotes

Squidward: [notices a tombstone outside his house as SpongeBob and Patrick attempt to put him to rest] Spongebob, are you trying to put me in the nuthouse?

SpongeBob: Nope, just into this hole.

Squidward: [sighs] SpongeBob, I have a confession to make...

SpongeBob: [as Squidward takes off the towel on his head, he gasps] You're bald?

Squidward: No, I'm not bald! I'm alive!

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Mr. Krabs: Oh, Squidward. We all came as soon as we were sure you were dead.

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[SpongeBob and Patrick have broken Squidward's wax sculpture of himself, and think it's Squidward]

SpongeBob SquarePants: I don't know quite how to say this, but I'm afraid our dear pal Squidward is... is pushing up daisies.

Patrick: Oh, I thought he was dead.

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[SpongeBob and Patrick think Squidward is a ghost]

Squidward: Enough! Squidward's ghost is feeling unusually generous today, and has decided to spare ye a horrible fate. Sssss. All you must do is obey my every whim and tickle my fancy on demand.

SpongeBob SquarePants: Does that include...?

Squidward: Quiet! Do as you're told, lest you incur the wrath of Squidward!

Patrick: I think they make a cream for that now.

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Patrick: [on Squidward] Yeah, he really needs to go up to the great beyond.

SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, say that again.

Patrick: That again.

SpongeBob SquarePants: No, the other thing.

Patrick: No, the other thing.

SpongeBob SquarePants: No, what you said before when you...

Patrick: No, what you said before when you...

SpongeBob SquarePants: Nevermind, I've got an idea!

Patrick: Never mind, I've got an idea.

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SpongeBob SquarePants: Okay, Patrick, Hike!

[Patrick blows on some chess pieces, while SpongeBob carries a rock and drops it]

SpongeBob SquarePants: You just lost three points.

[climbs coral tree]

SpongeBob SquarePants: One, two, five.

[blows bubble shaped like a G and a 7]

SpongeBob SquarePants: G-7!

Patrick: G-7? King me! King me!

[runs into coral]

Patrick: I lose!

SpongeBob SquarePants: But it's not Tuesday, Patrick.

Patrick: Tartar sauce!

Squidward: [opens window from house] Hey! What are you invertebrates doing?

SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick: We don't know.

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Squidward: I hunger for nourishment.

SpongeBob SquarePants: Nothing but the freshest, your ghostliness. A grape fresh from the vine, your noncorporealness. A banana peeled to your liking, your inmaterialness.

Patrick: [drops a huge watermelon on Squidward's mouth] One watermelon straight from the manure fields, your spookiness.

SpongeBob SquarePants: Art thou not pleased?

Squidward: Enough! I want something else, something hard to find.

SpongeBob SquarePants: We are here to please you.

Patrick: What do you hunger for, master?

Squidward: Cherry pie.

[Patrick pulls out a cherry pie from his back]

Squidward: Where did you get that?

Patrick: I found it.

Squidward: [throws away pie] Well, go find it again!

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SpongeBob SquarePants: This working out thing isn't working out.

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Shark: Hey! Hey you! Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy! Ooh, I'm a little peanut worm! Are you to much of a wimp to workout? Are you a weakling, built like a sponge? Now you too can have muscles, with Anchor Arms! They fit on like a glove. Just add air. How big do you want them? Normal? Veiny? And for the ladies, hairy. I was once a wimp before Anchor Arms. Now I'm a jerk and everybody loves me. So order now, wimp!

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SpongeBob SquarePants: I can do this. I've got Anchor Arms! I'm no wimp! I'm a jerk!

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[Patrick and SpongeBob are carring Squidward in his lounge chair]

SpongeBob SquarePants: Here?

Squidward: No, too wet.

SpongeBob SquarePants: Here?

Squidward: No, too hot. Keep moving. Keep moving.

[they move to a spoof of a Henri Toulouse-Lautrec poster]

SpongeBob SquarePants: Here?

Squidward: Too Louse-Lautrec.

[rimshot]

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SpongeBob SquarePants: Who were you expecting, Tiny Tim?

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SpongeBob SquarePants: [the duo knock over Squidward's wax sculpture of himself] Uh, Patrick I think there's something wrong with Squidward? He looks unconscious!

Patrick: Don't worry I know how to do this

[tries mouth to mouth resuscitation on the sculpture until he turns blue, floats up to the ceiling and lands on the sculpture's head]

SpongeBob SquarePants: Get off him Patrick!

Patrick: What are you worried about?

[the sculpture's flattened head appears to be smiling]

Patrick: he looks better already

SpongeBob SquarePants: [picks up the sculpture] But he still feels cold

Patrick: Well let's go put him in the warm

[places the sculpture in front of the window where the sun is shining]

SpongeBob SquarePants: Do you think he'll be okay?

Patrick: You know, you worry too much.

[the sculpture begins to melt]

Patrick: The Patrick is here and SpongeBob I know a lot about head injuries, believe...

[starts to drool as SpongeBob snaps his fingers at him to snap him out of it]

Patrick: ... me. Hey, what's that on your shoe?

[Sponge looks down]

SpongeBob SquarePants: I don't know

Patrick: It kind of looks like...

[the sculpture has melted into a puddle with Squidward's face]

SpongeBob SquarePantsPatrick: [horrified] Squidward!

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Patrick: [returns with the pie Squidward threw earlier] I found it!

Squidward: I'll take that!

[throws it in his face]

Patrick: Yes your ghostliness!

[licks pie off his face]

Patrick: this is fun.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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