Logan: As a rule, I like to start every school day with a hot blonde waiting for me in the parking lot.
Veronica: Me too.
Logan: I'm not blonde.
Veronica: Or hot.
Veronica Mars: You seen Thumper lately, Weevil? It's just, nobody's heard from him in weeks. If he doesn't show up soon, he's going to miss prom.
Eli "Weevil" Navarro: I'm sure he's crushed.
Veronica Mars: You come here to confess? Is that your tail I see between your legs?
Eli "Weevil" Navarro: No, but I can see how you might get confused.
Veronica Mars: I hate fake deer, too. Everytime I see one of their stupid fake deer faces I just wanna grab a shotgun and go all Cheney on them.
Veronica Mars: What did the guy look like?
Gia Goodman: All I saw was his butt. He gave us a pressed ham as he drove by.
Veronica Mars: I'm Veronica
Harry Greene: I know. You go to my school. You're like a cheerleader or something.
Veronica Mars: Or something.