Everybody Loves Raymond (TV Series)

Pet Cemetery (2000)

Peter Boyle: Frank Barone

Photos 

Quotes 

• Frank Barone : Bad animals go to hell, kid. Believe you me, I know. When I was your age, there was this mean old German Shepherd named Ilsa. I was walking to school one day and I must have crossed too close to her territory. In those days, the Germans were very sensitive about their territory. Well, that's all it took for Fraeulein Ilsa, the Nazi she-wolf, to jump out and take a hunk out of my all-American hide. I still have the scar. You want to see it? I'll show you...

  [Frank stands up and begins to unbuckle his trousers. Raymond, Debra, and Marie protest] 

  Raymond 'Ray' Barone : Dad, Dad, Dad! What are you doing? Sit down!

  Frank Barone : Oh, all right! The point is, Fraeulein Ilsa is probably in hell right now, dragging her Nazi butt across the devil's carpet.

  Raymond 'Ray' Barone : Thank you for that heart-warming story.

• Frank Barone : People heaven is for people. Your grandma's been hitting the sauce.

• Raymond 'Ray' Barone : Come on, Dad. Again, with the metal-detector? What are you doing?

  Frank Barone : Your mother's birthday's coming up.

  Raymond 'Ray' Barone : Dad, there's nothing here but rocks and dirt.

  Marie Barone : That's better than what he got me last year.

• Frank Barone : [after Ray's eulogy; tearfully]  Damn hamster!

• Raymond 'Ray' Barone : [Frank is going around in the rain with a metal detector]  Dad... Not with the metal detector.

  Frank Barone : You're mother's birthday is coming up.

  Raymond 'Ray' Barone : Dad, all you're going to find is dirt, leaves and worms.

  Marie Barone : That's better than what he gave me last year!