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"Futurama" A Pharaoh to Remember (TV Episode 2002) Poster

(TV Series)

(2002)

Quotes

Fry: You know what the worst thing about being a slave is? They make you work all day but they don't pay you or let you go.

Leela: That's the only thing about being a slave.

Bender: You've convinced me life is worth living... by showing me how bad my funeral will suck!

Bender: Citizens of me! The cruelty of the old Pharaoh is a thing of the past!

[crowd cheers]

Bender: Let a whole new wave of cruelty wash over this lazy land!

[crowd cheers, then is confused]

Leela: We're trying our best!

Bender: [yelling] Your best is an idiot!

Bender: [at a rollerblading circle] Hey, everybody! Do the Bender. This move's called the Bender.

Rollerblader: Yo, Hot Wheels. This circle is about free expression, not fascist moves.

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High Priest: We commend the body of our great Pharaoh Hamenthotep to the abode of the damned! The damned good-looking!

[pause]

High Priest: Pharaoh commanded me to tell that joke at his funeral.

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High Priest: We hear your voice, O Great Pharaoh! Reveal yourself to us!

Bender: [emerging from the reeds to pose as the Pharaoh] Behold! I have emerged from the place of spells and fairies!

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Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth: Your basic bending unit is made of an iron-osmium alloy, but Bender was different. Bender had an 0.04% nickel impurity.

Bender: It's what made me me.

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Fry: Incredible. This place is just like the Ancient Egypt of my day.

Osiran Slavemaster: That is no coincidence, for our people visited your Egypt thousands of years ago.

Fry: I knew it! Insane theories, one; regular theories, a billion.

Osiran Slavemaster: We learned many things from the mighty Egyptians, such as pyramid building, space travel, and how to prepare our dead so as to scare Abbott and Costello.

Fry: Also, Wolfman.

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High Priest: Great wall of prophecy, reveal to us the will of God, so that we may blindly obey!

Priests: Free us from thought and responsibility!

High Priest: We shall read things off you!

Priests: Then do them!

High Priest: Your words guide us!

Priests: We're dumb!

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High Priest: The prophecy is strange and crudely drawn at best. It indicates that we are here, and our next Pharaoh is over there, near some... tents.

Bender: [hiding in the reeds] Those are waves, jackass! It's supposed to be a river!

Fry: Hey, I think I know who the next Pharaoh is.

Leela: Oh, lord!

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Bender: I'm the first one to work. A new low.

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Bender: [after spray painting a picture of himself with the words "Bender lives large and kicks butt!" on a wall] There. Now no one will forget how I lived or my attitude regarding butt.

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Bender: [whilst being whipped] You call that motivating me? Don't just whip with your arms. The power comes from your hips. Like this.

[He takes the whip and whips himself. The rest of the slaves arrive with the block]

Leela: Bender, quit giving the slave drivers pointers!

Fry: Yeah, remember who your real friends are.

Bender: I'll tell you who I remember.

[points out tombs]

Bender: Enupsis! Pleotut! Whatsisname! He was the greatest of all.

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Fry: Dearly Beloved, we are here today to remember Bender, taken from us in the prime of life; when he was crushed by a runaway semi, driven by the Incredible Hulk.

Bender: Aww, you knew my favorite cause of death.

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Fry: You know what the worst thing about being a slave is? They make you work hard without paying you or letting you go.

Leela: Fry, that's the only thing about being a slave.

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Leela: Did you really think you'd need all this junk in the afterlife?

Bender: Afterlife? Pfft. If I'd thought I had to go through a whole 'nother life, I'd kill myself right now.

Leela: Well rot in peace.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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