Thirtysomething (TV Series)

Housewarming (1987)

Melanie Mayron: Melissa Steadman

Quotes 

• Melissa Steadman : You want everything to be really nice and beautiful for the housewarming so that all your business friends, who you don't really like, will be really impressed.

  Michael Steadman : Exactly.

  Hope Murdoch Steadman : I mean, can't we find a simpler solution? You know, more like an intermediate idea? A compromise approach.

  Melissa Steadman : Cheaper.

  Michael Steadman : No, no, it's okay. It's okay. All the people will come, and they'll rip their clothes on the nails, and they'll say "What's that mildew smell?". They'll lose all respect for me, and I'll go bankrupt. I can handle that.

• Melissa Steadman : Who's coming to this extravaganza, anyway?

  Michael Steadman : You know who's gonna be there. Acquaintances. All the people you say you're gonna get together with and never do. All the people that had you to some horrible dinner, and now you owe them but you don't want to see them alone. All the people that are cooler than you, and wish you they would be your friends, so you invite them over and hope that they'll invite you back. Acquaintances.

  Melissa Steadman : Name names.

  Michael Steadman : Tony Valani, Ray Godshaw, Jerry Stahl, Marcy Madelman, Linda Louwe.

  Melissa Steadman : I don't even know these people and they're boring.

  Michael Steadman : So don't come. Save me six dollars in hors d'oeuvres.

• Michael Steadman : $5,346 for a breakfast room? Is this guy out of his mind?

  Melissa Steadman : [trying to be helpful]  Sell the baby.

  Hope Murdoch Steadman : We've waited this long. We can wait $5,000 longer.

  Melissa Steadman : Mikey's moping.

  Michael Steadman : I'm not moping. I'm sulking.

• Melissa Steadman : Mikey, why are you getting so worried? Think about Grandpa Morrie. He never worried. He lived his life. He didn't take any crap from anybody.

  Michael Steadman : Right. He was full of wisdom, which was very useful for people living in Kiev in 1912.