Karen: Hey, what's going on here? I'm sensing a mood.
Grace: Well, Will thinks that I'm taking advantage of...
- Yeah, save it honey. We'll crack it open later when we're desperate.
Will: It's always "Will and Grace." Will and Grace buy the present. Will and Grace do the speech. "We cordially invite Will and Grace." why don't they ever say "Will and guest"?
Grace: Well, who did you want to bring?
Will: I don't know! One of the Gap dancers, Aquaman, anyone!
Grace: Well, who's stopping you?
Will: You are! Because you're so content to play Mrs. Will Truman. I want a husband. I want someone who loves me, a-and a family. I want this, not this!
Grace: I do not know where you got the idea that I am your wife, but let me tell you something, if that's true, we've got big martial problems because Mrs. Truman's getting a lot of action on the side.
Jack: [jumpy] Why isn't there any coffee?
Karen: The same reason you don't have a wife and three kids honey... It's the way God wants it.
Jack: [High on coffee, and saying speedily] Hey, friends, lovers, mothers and other strangers. You are never going to believe what's happened to me... Oh, my God, did you just see that? I almost did a half nelson, I almost bruised my delicates, my delicates, my domo arigatos, Mr tomatoes.
[Gulps iced coffee drink]
Jack: Huge News! I have met, are you ready for this, Mr Right, well, Mr Right Now, anyway. Good night, folks, I'm here all week, Jack 2000. He works over at the Jumpin Java - you know, that coffee shop on seventy second and his name is Paul and he is cute with a capital Q! And the busier it gets, the hotter he gets, and the hotter he gets, the sweatier he gets, and the sweatier he gets... I forgot where I'm goin with this, but the point is me likey he and he likey me and the best part is... , schezam! he gives me free iced coffee every time I go in which is every hour on the hour and thank you very much and occasionally on the half hour. Ba ba ba ba ba