- Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: One in forty American men wear women's clothing and we've had well over forty presidents. I'm just saying, one of these guys was dancing around the Oval Office in a prom dress. Now let's get to the bottom of that.
- Claudia Jean 'C.J.' Cregg: You guys are like Butch and Sundance peering over the edge of a cliff to the boulder-filled rapids 300 feet below, thinking you better not jump 'cause there's a chance you might drown. The President has this disease and has been lying about it, and you guys are worried that the polling might make us look bad? It's the fall that's gonna kill ya.
- Abbey Bartlet: I haven't come in here because it seems that every time I do there's a new White House Counsel. I think Leo keeps them in the basement like those two ladies in Arsenic and Old Lace.
- Toby Ziegler: He calls you and me the Batman and Robin of speech-writing.
- Sam Seaborn: Well, I don't think he does.
- Toby Ziegler: He doesn't, but he should, 'cause that's what we are.
- Sam Seaborn: Okay.
- Toby Ziegler: We're Batman and Robin.
- Sam Seaborn: Which one's which?
- Toby Ziegler: Look at me, Sam. Am I Robin?
- Sam Seaborn: I'm not Robin.
- Toby Ziegler: Yes you are.
- Sam Seaborn: Okay, well, let's move off this.
- Toby Ziegler: You bet, little friend.
- Sam Seaborn: Listen, we're really not Batman and Robin.
- Toby Ziegler: No, we'll keep those identities secret. I'm Bruce Wayne and you're my ward... Dick Something.
- Donna Moss: Does anybody know if it's gonna rain this afternoon? They're asking me.
- Staffer: The paper said mid-afternoon.
- Donna Moss: So we know it won't be that. Cal the Navy Yard for me, would you?
- Staffer: Yeah.
- Larry: [Ed and Larry approach, laughing] Donna.
- Donna Moss: Yeah.
- Larry: Have you seen C.J.?
- Donna Moss: No. What's so funny?
- Larry: Ed just got a fax...
- [laughing]
- Larry: I'm sorry. Ed just got a fax from a man named Byron Talmadge. He's the Associate Administrator for NASA's Office of Space Cadets.
- Ed: Flight.
- Larry: Office of Space Flight.
- Ed: The OSF.
- Donna Moss: What's the fax say?
- Larry: A huge Chinese satellite is gonna come crashing to Earth, and we don't know where, and we don't know when.
- Donna Moss: Seriously?
- Ed: Yeah, it's right here in the fax.
- Donna Moss: A satellite is... crashing to Earth and NASA sent us a fax?
- Ed: Yeah.
- Donna Moss: This is for real.
- Larry: Yes.
- Donna Moss: [terrified] A satellite is gonna crash into the Earth?
- Larry, Ed: Yes!
- Donna Moss: Why are you laughing?
- Ed: We thought it was funny.
- [the two of them turn to leave]
- Donna Moss: I'm an assistant. What am I supposed to do with this information?
- Larry: The fax was for C.J., just give it to her when you see her.
- Staffer: Donna, they say it's not going to rain this afternoon.
- Donna Moss: Well, that's a relief.
- Donna Moss: So, NASA's OSF tells us that the 30th Space Wing at Vandenberg Air Force Base believes that a Chinese satellite has fallen out of its orbital... flight plan. The last detection the 30th had placed it in what they call a "degrading orbital path" and it's now dropped off their radar, suggesting it's begun a rapid fall towards the Earth's atmosphere.
- Charlie Young: [walks back behind his desk] Cool.
- Donna Moss: No, it's not! What's the matter with you people?
- Charlie Young: What'd I do?
- Donna Moss: A thing the size of a garbage truck is gonna be in a two-thousand-mile-an-hour free fall and no one knows where it's gonna hit!
- Charlie Young: I'm rooting for Zurich.
- Donna Moss: Charlie...
- Charlie Young: I've had it up to here with the Swiss.
- White House Counsel Oliver Babish: I'm going to have to ask you some questions, and the less you can be pissed at the world for no particular reason, the better I think.