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Quotes

[with the cabinet member who stays behind during a State of the Union address]

President Josiah Bartlet: Oh, Roger. If anything happened, you know what to do, right?

Secretary of Agriculture Roger Tribbey: I honestly hadn't thought about it, sir.

President Josiah Bartlet: First thing always is national security. Get your commanders together. Appoint Joint Chiefs, appoint a chairman. Take us to defcon 4. Have the governors send emergency delegates to Washington. The assistant Attorney General is going to be the Acting A.G. If he tells you he wants to bring out the National Guard, do what he tells you. You got a best friend?

Secretary of Agriculture Roger Tribbey: Yes, sir.

President Josiah Bartlet: Is he smarter than you?

Secretary of Agriculture Roger Tribbey: Yes, sir.

President Josiah Bartlet: Would you trust him with your life?

Secretary of Agriculture Roger Tribbey: Yes, sir.

President Josiah Bartlet: That's your chief of staff.

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President Josiah Bartlet: I came to this hallowed chamber one year ago on a mission, to restore the American dream for all our people as we gaze at the vast horizon of possibilities open to us... in the 321st century. Wow, that was ambitious of me, wasn't it?

Sam Seaborn: Leo.

Leo McGarry: Let's take a break.

President Josiah Bartlet: We meant stronger here right?

Sam Seaborn: What's it say?

President Josiah Bartlet: I'm proud to report our country's stranger than it was a year ago.

Sam Seaborn: That's a typo.

President Josiah Bartlet: Could go either way.

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C.J. Cregg: What are you taking?

President Josiah Bartlet: I don't know. My wife hands me pills, I swallow them with water.

Sam Seaborn: Sir?

President Josiah Bartlet: Vitamin C, Vitamin B. Is it possible I'm taking something called euthanasia?

Sam Seaborn: Echinacea?

President Josiah Bartlet: Ah, that sounds more like it.

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President Josiah Bartlet: I could jump you right now.

Abbey Bartlet: I could kill you right now.

President Josiah Bartlet: My thing's more fun.

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President Josiah Bartlet: I was watching a television program before, with a sort of a roving moderator who spoke to a seated panel of young women who were having some sort of problem with their boyfriends - apparently, because the boyfriends had all slept with the girlfriends' mothers. Then they brought the boyfriends out, and they all fought, right there on television. Toby, tell me: these people don't vote, do they?

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President Josiah Bartlet: What do you think, Josh?

Josh Lyman: I make it a point never to disagree with Toby when he's right, Mr. President.

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Abbey Bartlet: [POTUS didn't call Abbey when he collapsed because he had to go to the situation room to deal with Pakistan and India] I don't care if Canada invaded Michigan, Jed. You call me.

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Charlie Young: How are you feeling, sir?

President Josiah Bartlet: I'm feeling roughly the same as I was feeling when you asked me four minutes ago.

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[Abigail Bartlet is examining her husband]

President Josiah Bartlet: Here's the thing, though: I never really saw you study while you were in med school.

Abbey Bartlet: Deep breath.

President Josiah Bartlet: Do you even know what you're listening for right now?

Abbey Bartlet: Do you know how many other people I could have married?

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Lord John Marbury: When we had a particular problem with someone, one solution we would try is to make him a maharajah. That's a kind of a regional king. We would pay him off with an annual tribute and in return he would be loyal to the crown.

Leo McGarry: Lord Marbury, under our constitution the President is not empowered to create maharajahs.

Lord John Marbury: Yes, thank you for clearing that up, Leo. Having been educated at Cambridge and the Sorbonne I am, as you know, exceedingly stupid.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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