[hanging from a tree]
Christopher Titus: You can't handle your own life.
[Christopher falls and gets his snowboard caught in another tree; Dave laughs]
Dave Scouvel: That's justice, Titus! Tree justice. The mighty oak strikes back.
[Titus looks around at his surroundings]
Christopher Titus: It's a spruce!
Christopher Titus: The truth hurts. It used to sooth, but, then my dad got a hold of it. When I was seventeen, he told me the truth about love. He called our little talk, "The birds, the bees and your girlfriend's a slut."