Neptune: The accursed stove has burnt my finger.
Neptune: Feel thine own wrath, stove! Ha ha!
SpongeBob SquarePants: What did I tell you about using your powers, trainee?
Neptune: [ashamed] Perfect patties are made with love, not magic.
Squidward Tentacles: [after Squidward goes too far pulling an April Fool's Prank on Spongebob] Where's Spongebob?
Patrick: He's in the house. He's impressed.
Squidward Tentacles: With what?
Patrick: I don't know, but it must have been pretty good to make him cry like that.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Woo, I'm thirsty.
[Pulls an enormous pitcher of lemonade out of the fridge]
SpongeBob SquarePants: This is an extreme thirst.
[Cut to SpongeBob in front of dozens of glasses of lemonade]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Boy, I can't wait to drink all these drinks. April Fool!
[Looks in mirror]
SpongeBob SquarePants: To me.
Squidward Tentacles: Why is it when I'm having fun... it's wrong?
Squidward Tentacles: Why is he so happy about?
[Sees the calendar set on April 1st]
Squidward Tentacles: Aah! April 1st? April Fool's Day is SpongeBob's favorite holiday!
Squidward Tentacles: Mr. Krabs, I can't come in to work today. I caught something horrible.
Mr. Krabs: What'd you catch?
Squidward Tentacles: I caught sight of the calendar.
Neptune: So, little one? You think you are worthy of being the royal fry cook? I will prove your worthlessness. You shall be tested in a challenge.
Patrick: Bring it on. SpongeBob can handle any...
[Neptune zaps him]
Neptune: Your friend's arrogance will cost you dearly. There will be two challenges.
Patrick: Two? What is two challenges to someone like SpongeBob?
[Neptune zaps him again]
Neptune: Three challenges!
Patrick: Only three? Three challenges is nothing. It might as well be... five hundred challenges.
Patrick: [Now just a smudge on the ground] We'll settle for one.
Neptune: There will be but one challenge. You will face me in... the Ultimate Cookoff!
SpongeBob SquarePants: I will accept your challenge, if you fix my friend.
Neptune: Ah, yes. The round one. I shall restore him.
[restores Patrick, only he has no face]
Patrick: SpongeBob? SpongeBob?
[turns around; his face is on his butt]
Patrick: SpongeBob? There you are.
SpongeBob SquarePants: How you feeling?
Patrick: Pretty good. Say, have you gotten taller?
Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, lad. I have the utmost confidence in you.
[Runs to the betting booth with a pile of cash]
Mr. Krabs: Put it all on Neptune!
SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm not good enough to to cook in Atlantis Patrick, I should've never taken the challenge
Patrick: Don't give up on your dream SpongeBob, people used to tell me: "Patrick you'll never amount to anything, you'll always have your head in the clouds" Well just look at me now!
[points at his face on his butt]
Patrick: [the bell rings] Go get em tiger!
Neptune: This joke has gone on far enough!, where's my fry cook?
[everyone runs except Patrick]
Neptune: [pointing at Patrick] Certainly you with your prodigious girth would know how to cook a burger to serve a royal palate!
[Patrick points at SpongeBob]
Neptune: What? Am I expected to believe that this creature is royal fry cook material? I don't suppose you have any proof?
[Patrick shows him the picture he took of SpongeBob holding the royal spatula]
Neptune: Ha! This thing is unfit to even scrub the Royal tail fin! And besides it's not just enough to pull a spatula from a greasy griddle, there are certain qualities a royal fry cook must have.
SpongeBob SquarePants: Like?
Neptune: The Royal fry cook must be left handed
SpongeBob SquarePants: Actually I've got two
[shows him his two left hands]
Neptune: [snaps his fingers as he comes up with another idea] Also the Royal fry cook wears red underwear
[Spongebob shows him his red underwear]
Neptune: no blue
[Spongebob shows him blue underwear underneath]
Neptune: The Royal fry cook's wallet contains...
[Spongebob shows him his wallet]
Neptune: His big toes...
[Spongebob shows him his big toes]
Neptune: Uh, he has six...
Patrick: [interrupting him] He is the new Royal fry cook and you...
Patrick: [charred and smoking] It is hot in here or what?
SpongeBob SquarePants: [gasps] Patrick! You hurt my friend!, You're not a king your a bully and a liar!