The Simpsons (TV Series)
Homie the Clown (1995)
Harry Shearer: Bill the Accountant, Lenny, Georgian Clown Student, Russian Clown Student, Graduating Clown Student, Award Announcer, Plastic Surgeon, Ned Flanders
Quotes
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Homer : But wait. You can't kill me for being Krusty. I'm not him. I'm Homer Simpson.
Fat Tony : The same Homer Simpson who crashed his car through the wall of our club?
Homer : Uh... actually my name is Barney. Yeah, Barney Gumble.
Legs : The same Barney Gumble who keeps taking pictures of my sister?
Homer : Uh... actually my real name is uh... think Krusty, think... Joe Valachi!
Louie : The same Joe Valachi who squealed to the Senate Committee about organized crime?
Homer : Benedict Arnold!
Legs : The same Benedict Arnold who plotted to surrender West Point to the hated British?
Homer : D'oh!
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[gunshot, Flanders is knocked down]
Ned Flanders : Whew, good thing I always keep a Bible next to my...
[second gunshot, Flanders is knocked down again]
Ned Flanders : Whew, luckily I was wearing an extra large piece of the True Cross today. I think I'll go inside.
[as he runs off, a third gunshot spins the head of Homer's pickaxe]
Homer : What keeps doing that?
Fat Tony : I told you we should have bought more than three bullets.
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Krusty's Accountant : Krusty as your accountant, I must warn you...
Krusty the Clown : Did you send those thousand roses to Bea Arthur's grave?
Krusty's Accountant : Yes, but as I told you, she's still...
Krusty the Clown : I don't want to hear the end of any sentences!
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Krusty the Clown : Tell me where you're from.
Clown Student 1# : Georgia.
Clown Student 2# : Texas.
Clown Student 3# : Uh... Brooklyn.
Clown Student 4# : Russia.
Clown Student 5# : New Hampshire.
Homer : Homer.
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Krusty's Accountant : Let me get this straight. You took all the money you made franchising your name and bet it *against* the Harlem Globetrotters?
Krusty the Clown : [miserable] Oh, I thought the Generals were due!
[watches the game on TV]
Krusty the Clown : He's spinning the ball on his finger! Just take it! Take it!
[the Globetrotters score]
Krusty the Clown : That game was fixed! They were using a freakin' ladder, for God's sake!
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Plastic Surgeon : Krusty, your plastic surgery is complete. Now, when I remove the bandages, don't be alarmed at the total stranger staring back at you.
Krusty the Clown : [looks at the mirror] AAAAAAAAHHH! I LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME, YOU MORON!
Plastic Surgeon : Oh, nonsense, Krusty. You look at least 10 years younger. Plus I did your breasts.
Krusty the Clown : Does anybody hear me complaining about the breasts?
