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(TV Series)

(2001)

Quotes

[while Moe is away, Homer is in charge of the bar]

Homer: [picks up phone] Hello?

Bart: Hello, is Ali Tabooger there?

Homer: Ooh, Bart. My first prank phone call. What do I do? What do I do?

Bart: Don't panic. Just ask for Ali Tabooger.

Homer: I don't get it.

Bart: Ask for I'll Eat A Booger.

Homer: What's the joke?

Bart: [sighs] Forget it.

[hangs up]

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[R.E.M. is playing in Homer's garage]

Peter Buck: Michael, are you sure these guys are millionaires?

Michael Stipe: Of course I'm sure, would a poor person afford to have a bar in his garage?

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Moe: You can't run a bar in your garage, it's illegal.

Homer: Bar? This isn't a bar. This is a hunting club.

Michael Stipe: You lied to us.

[Michael Stipe smashes a beer bottle and tries to attack Homer]

Peter Buck: Michael, no.

Mike Mills: It's not the R.E.M. way.

Michael Stipe: You're right. Come on, let's recycle these shards and get out of here.

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[Homer, Lenny, Carl and Barney are sitting in Homer's garage, drinking]

Homer: [to Marge] Barkeep. Another beer.

Marge: Wasn't this supposed to be your tavern?

Homer: It's a family place. Right, kids?

Lisa: Can we go to bed now?

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Moe: It's like my dad always said: eventually, everybody gets shot.

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[singing along with an R.E.M. song]

Homer: Leonardo what-his-name, Herman Munster motorcade, birthday party Cheet-Os, pogo sticks and lemonade, idiotic stupid jerk, that's right Flanders, I am talking about you!

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Lisa: This is pretty far to go just to spite Moe, isn't it?

Homer: It's not about spite, it's about petty revenge, and getting back at that traitor Moe.

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Dr. Bob Kaufmann: Is there a lot of screaming at your house?

Bart: Well, my dad's always yelling about the white man keeping him down.

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[At Moe's alma mater, the bartending college]

Professor: Moe Szyslak, you old glass wipe.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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