George orders hair growing cream from China. Jerry is mesmerized by a dirty message left on a tape recorder from his last performance. George becomes infatuated with Elaine.

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Storyline

Jerry has used a voice recorder at his most recent gig so he can listen to some of his new material. A woman has added her own voice-over to part of the tape and for Jerry, George and Kramer, it is the most erotic thing they have ever heard. Elaine thinks it's all very funny since she's the woman on the tape. While Jerry frantically tries to track the mysterious woman down, Elaine tells George the truth and he is suddenly infatuated with her. George has also ordered some hair growing cream from china but it has a particularly bad smell. Written by garykmcd

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Comedy

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13 November 1991 (USA)  »

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4:3
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Did You Know?

Trivia

The Chinese baldness cure is based on something Larry David tried in real life. The shots Kramer takes of George's scalp are identical to those the real Kenny Kramer took of Larry David. See more »

Goofs

When Kramer films George and Elaine with his camcorder, the left edge of the street-facing wall of the 'Jerry's apartment' set appears briefly. See more »

Quotes

Jerry Seinfeld: Elaine, have you ever gone out with a bald man?
Elaine Benes: No.
Jerry Seinfeld: You know what that makes you? A baldist.
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User Reviews

 
"I don't know, who keeps track of hellos?"
30 October 2008 | by (Italy) – See all my reviews

Rarely has there been a comedic ensemble as good as Seinfeld's, mainly because the show allowed the four protagonists to team up differently every time. The most hilarious proof of this is The Tape, which features the best pairing of George and Elaine ever conceived in the series' nine years.

Remarkably, the episode focuses on pretty much one single storyline: with the exception of the bits where George orders hair-growing cream from China, the narrative is constantly occupied by the guys' reactions to a dirty message a female fan left on Jerry's tape recorder and George's adorably ridiculous infatuation with Elaine when he discovers she's the one who did it. This leads to some incredibly embarrassing moments when he has to explain the situation to jerry without revealing the whole truth.

Aside from her acerbic wit (always sharp as a state-of-the-art razor), Elaine's best quality is her sex appeal, and the show's writers always knew how to exploit it to great comic effect. For a good example of this, look no further than the scene where she reenacts the dirty talk in front of an unsuspecting George (if only all moronic sitcom sidekicks were like him...), or the perfectly timed epilogue, with all four main performers on top form. Although it's Jason Alexander who, as usual, gets most of the funniest scenes, the episode is in fact dominated by Julia Louis-Dreyfus, body and voice (sorry, I just had to say that). The only scene that comes close to her standout effort without her being in it (for the most part, at least) is when Jerry and George engage in a weirdly funny conversation about the habit of saying "hello". Priceless, as always.


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