George Costanza: You should've seen the look on her face. It was the same look my father gave me when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist.
Jerry Seinfeld: Babu? Babu?
[waves Babu to come to table]
Jerry Seinfeld: Babu... you know, I got to tell you, I never do this, but the shrimp, it's just that it's a little stringy. You have any chicken?
Babu Bhatt: The shrimp is stringy?
Jerry Seinfeld: Well, maybe your refrige...
Babu Bhatt: QUIET! You shut up! You make me change restaurant, but nobody come! You say, "make Pakistani", Babu Bhatt have only Pakistani restaurant. But where are people? You see people? Show me people! There ARE no people!
Jerry Seinfeld: You know, I think I'll just take the check.
Babu Bhatt: You bad man! You very very bad man!
Jerry Seinfeld: [Thinking] Bad man? Could my mother have been wrong?
Jerry Seinfeld: [Opening monologue] There's always that one location, one store location that's constantly changing hands. Everybody has this in their neighborhood, it's a leather store, it's a yogurt shop, it's a pet supply. It's constantly changing and nobody can do business there. It's like some sort of Bermuda triangle of retail, you know? Stores open up and then they just disappear without a trace. Nobody knows what happened to 'em. I guess eventually when like aliens land in mother ship of Close Encounters, bottom will slowly open and all these store owners will come wondering out in a daze going 'I thought there would be more walk-in traffic didn't you?'
Jerry Seinfeld: [Watching Babu's restaurant with binoculars] He's serving Mexican, Italian, Chinese. He's all over the place. That's why no one's going in.
Elaine Benes: Why do you keep watching?
Jerry Seinfeld: I don't know, I'm obsessed with it. It's like a spider in the toilet struggling for survival. And even though ya know he's not going to make it, you kind of root for him for a second.
Elaine Benes: And then you flush.
Jerry Seinfeld: Well, it's a spider.