Saved by the Bell (TV Series)
All in the Mall (1991)
Mario Lopez: A.C. Slater
Photos
Quotes
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Kelly Kapowski : Hey, where's Screech? Shouldn't he have the tickets by now?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Uh, well, uh, you see... Hey, let's go eat! Come on!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Yeah!
Kelly Kapowski : What happened, guys?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : He was born. Need I say more?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Look, I'm sorry, Kelly. He accidentally stepped outta line and lost his place.
Kelly Kapowski : Well, you better call a priest.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Why?
Kelly Kapowski : Because Lisa's gonna kill him and I'm gonna have bad thoughts.
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Lisa Turtle : [Finds a bag] Hey, whose bag is this?
Kelly Kapowski : Not mine.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : It's not mine.
Lisa Turtle : Whoa, mama!
Kelly Kapowski , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater , Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Whoa, mama!
Kelly Kapowski : Is that real money?
Lisa Turtle : [smells the money] Smells like it.
[holds it to her ear and ruffles it]
Lisa Turtle : Sounds like five thousand, give or take a twenty.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Oh, yes! Yes! This is going to be a good day after all.
Kelly Kapowski : Wait a second. I mean, this isn't our money. I mean, some poor person lost it and we have to return it.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Oh, get real, Kelly, what poor person has five thousand dollars?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Well, if they weren't poor before, they're poor now.
Kelly Kapowski : We can't keep this. It's somebody else's money.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : All right, all right, let's be fair. I mean, if it is someone's money, we should give them time to reclaim it. Agreed?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : All right.
Lisa Turtle : Yeah.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Okay, good, good. Then I hereby invoke the five foot, five second rule.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : The what?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : If no-one is within five feet of this money when I count to five, it's ours. Huh? One, two, three, four...
Kelly Kapowski : Cut it out, Zack. We have to ask around and see if anybody lost five thousand dollars.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Okay, okay.
[whispering]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Has anybody lost five thousand dollars?
Lisa Turtle : Look, I don't know what you two are arguing about. This is my money. I'm the one who found the bag.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Wha... your money? You never would've found the bag if Zack and I didn't slide over so you could sit down.
Lisa Turtle : Okay, I'll split it with you.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Alri-i-i-i-i-ight!
Kelly Kapowski : Split it with them? There wouldn't be a bag to find if I didn't sit at this bench. You'd still be rattling on about Eddie and his Air Jordans!
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Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [Trying to get elderly woman to let Screech go ahead of her in line] Excuse me, ma'am? Hi! I wonder if you'd let my friend go ahead of you. He missed last year's concert.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Yes, and you see, he was so depressed that he locked himself in the basement for a year.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Uh huh, and today is his first day out.
Old Woman : No way, blondie. I never miss a U2 concert!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Well, uh, would fifty dollars help you change your mind?
[Takes a bill out of the bag]
Kelly Kapowski : What are you doing? That's our ticket money.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Hey, you're forgetting about our find.
[Hands Slater two bills]
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Um, did he say fifty, beautiful? 'Cause I think he meant one hundred, little darlin'.
Old Woman : One hundred smackers? Make it two and I'm outta here.
[Zack hands Slater two more bills]
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Here you go.
[Hands her the money and she leaves]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Alright! One more customer and we're rich!
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Alright!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [a "sold out" sign is placed in the ticket window] What?
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Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [the girls arrive at the movies, flustered] What's going on?
Lisa Turtle : It's those weird guys, they were following us! We saw them at the boutique!
Kelly Kapowski : They're obviously killers! I mean, we've stolen their money and now we're gonna die! I'll never get married, I'll never have a little white picket fence, I'll never get a letter from Ed McMahon again!
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Oh, Kelly, shut up! They're not killers, they're just shoppers. This is a mall, you know.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Yeah. Look, this money's making us paranoid. I'm sure nothing weird is gonna happen while we're in here.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Relax.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : [Screech enters, dressed in a muscle filled superhero costume] Hi, guys.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Take that back.
Kelly Kapowski : Screech, why are you dressed like that?
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : 'Cause they wanted three hundred dollars for the Little Bo Beep costume.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Yeah, but why are you wearing this costume?
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Ha. See, that way, when the bad guys come, they won't notice me.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : The only place you wouldn't be noticed is in a nuthouse.
Lisa Turtle : Don't be so sure.
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Woman in Film : [the gang are watching a movie] Don't go, Jonathan. I can't live without you.
Man in Film : If you want me to stay, Lydia, let me hear those three special words.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [In high voice] Oh, Jonathan. Not here. Not now.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : [In deep voice] Oh, Lydia, don't tease me so. You know how weak I am.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [In high voice] It doesn't matter, Jonathan. You're rich.
Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle : Ssssshhhhh!
[the girls move to the seats in front]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : What? Girls!
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : What? You gonna move?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : [Slater places his fake hand between the girls]
[In ghostly voices]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Mwahahahaha!
Lisa Turtle : [Both turn round and swipe at them] You're so infantile, Slater!
Kelly Kapowski : We're trying to watch the movie!
Woman in Film : Oh, Jonathan, I love you. Let's ask the warden to marry us.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : [In deep voice] Are you proposing to me, my precious flower?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [In high voice] Oh, yes, darling. You're the only man I ever loved.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : [In deep voice] Lydia.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : [In high voice] Jonathan.
[the two embrace then laugh]
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Can I be the best man?
Lisa Turtle : [Turns round] No, but you can be the dork of honor! Now shut up, I'm trying to watch the movie!
[Zack giggles]
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : You can't scare Screechman.
Lisa Turtle : Oh, no? Watch this.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Ooh, ooh, ooh!
Lisa Turtle : [Turns round, shakes fist then spots the two men] It's them! They're here.
Kelly Kapowski : "Oh, just shopping, it's a mall, you know." Right. I hope they kill you two first!
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Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Oh, officer, officer! I'm glad we found you.
Kelly Kapowski : We need your help.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : These two mob guys are chasing us.
Lisa Turtle : They want this money back that we found here yesterday.
Kelly Kapowski : Or they're gonna kill us!
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Is that a jelly doughnut?
Mall Cop : Yes! Which means I'm on break. Heh. Come back in ten minutes.
Kelly Kapowski : Ten minutes? In ten minutes, we're gonna be wearing cement boots, sleeping in the ocean with the fishies!
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Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Save us from those guys!
Mall Cop : Why should I? I'm with them.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : What?
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : I want my Mommy!
Louie : All right, kids. Hand over the dough.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : All right. All right. Here you go. See ya!
Louie : You're not going anywhere! We've got a surprise for you.
Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle : [tearfully] We're dead!
Frankie : No, kids, you're on Candid Video!
[a camera crew reveals themselves]
Frankie : Wave to everyone at home!
Kelly Kapowski : [They all wave halfheartedly in disbelief] The television show?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : You mean you've been videotaping this whole thing?
Louie : That's right. The ticket line, the movies, the boutique, everything.
Lisa Turtle : Urgh. Well this is terrible! I was wearing the same outfit for two days!
Mall Cop : And for being guests on our show, Candid Video's gonna give you five front row tickets to the U2 concert!
Samuel 'Screech' Powers , Zachary 'Zack' Morris , Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : What?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Five front row tickets? Do you know how much money we could get for these?
Samuel 'Screech' Powers , Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : No!
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Kelly Kapowski : Wow, look at this line.
Lisa Turtle : [sigh] Man, we'll never get tickets to the U2 concert.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Oh, ye of little faith.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : That's right. Yeah, we told you we had a plan. Hey, have I ever let you guys down before?
Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle : Yeah!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : When?
Lisa Turtle : The time you snuck us into the drive-in movie in the trunk of your car.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : So I forgot the trunk key! You still got to hear the movie.
Kelly Kapowski : But it was a Japanese movie!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Hey, I tried to read the subtitles as fast as I could.
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Kelly Kapowski : [the gang goes to the front of the line where Screech is asleep] Hey, how did Screech get ahead of the line?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : He slept here all night.
Lisa Turtle : How'd you get him to do that?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Simple. We bribed him with a new teddy bear.
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Lisa Turtle : Hi, guys!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Hey, Lisa. So, how are things going with you and the shoe salesman?
Lisa Turtle : Oh, they're lookin' good. Eddie wants to give me a ride in his Air Jordans.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : How many pairs of shoes did you buy, Lisa?
Lisa Turtle : Oh, just three. I'm on a tight budget.
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Zachary 'Zack' Morris : I think I've got a way to solve this money problem.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : How? Give it all to you?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Alright, I'll think of another way.
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Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Whoa, Screech! How'd you move up in line so fast?
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Old Disneyland tactic. I hid under a fern until I could blend into line.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : You're goofy.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : No, but that's who taught me.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Look, Screech, we've got a little secret to tell you, but you gotta promise to keep it quiet.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Hey, did I ever tell Slater how you filled his locker with tapicoa pudding?
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : That was you?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Uhhhhh...
[Snickers]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : We don't have time for that.
[Lisa hands him the bag]
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Look, Screech, we want you to buy a lot of tickets 'cause we just found five thousand dollars.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : [Loudly] Five thousand dollars?
[Lisa puts her hand over his mouth]
Lisa Turtle : [to Screech] Okay?
[He murmurs yes, she removes her hand]
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Hmm. Did you have a doughnut for breakfast, Lisa? Your hand tastes good.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Oh, man!
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater , Kelly Kapowski , Lisa Turtle : Urgh!
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Kelly Kapowski : I think we should turn the money in right away.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Hey, hey, hey, let's not be so rash. There are plenty of ways to make a quick buck.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Yeah! We could invest in the stock market and double our money.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : That's right.
Kelly Kapowski : And what if we lose?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Who cares? It's not our money!
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Lisa Turtle : [after a loudspeaker announcement has revealed that a new U2 concert has been added due to demand for the first] This is great! We have a second chance to go to the concert!
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Better yet, another chance to make a killing selling tickets.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Oh, no, I'm not sleeping here again. Last night, the security dogs were nipping at my underwear.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : No, Screech, this time, we're all staying so we're guaranteed to be first in line.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Well, wait, how are we gonna pull that off, Preppie?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : I don't know yet, but I do know we have a lot of money and, uh, a lot of hours to kill.
Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Hey, how about a little advance on tomorrow's profits, huh?
Lisa Turtle : Yeah. Tickle my palm, honey. I've got places to go and shoes to try on.
Kelly Kapowski : And I guess it'd be all right to look at some bathing suits. They were selling them for half off.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Oh, which half are you gonna buy?
Kelly Kapowski : You know, I've always defended you, but you really are a bozo.
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Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : [Inside tent] Can you please move? Your foot is on my hand.
Zachary 'Zack' Morris : Hey, your hand is on my foot.
Lisa Turtle : It's dark in here.
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : That's alright, my darling, I have X-Ray vision.
[Commotion inside tent]
Samuel 'Screech' Powers : Ow!
Lisa Turtle : Get rid of that stupid costume!
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Kelly Kapowski : [the gang are dressed in the outfits the wedding store mannequins had on] We should've returned the money right when we found it! Lisa, why'd you have to be so nosey and pick up that bag?
Zachary 'Zack' Morris , Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater : Yeah!
Lisa Turtle : Hey, don't blame this on me! Zack's the one with all the bright ideas!
[Suddenly smiling]
Lisa Turtle : Hey, Kelly, is my corsage on straight?
Kelly Kapowski : [Smiling] Yeah, it looks great!