- Lauren Hutton: Brooke Shields is one of the world's leading microphysicists! Cybill Shepherd invented the laser beam!
- TransEastern announcer: TransEastern airlines. You feel like you never left the ground. Because we treat you like dirt.
- Mary Gross: Ah, what a satisfying read! This classic flowed from the pen of Dierdre Deloquaro Dinn, perhaps the only living author to have written more books than she's read.