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"Roseanne" White Men Can't Kiss (TV Episode 1994) Poster

(TV Series)

(1994)

Quotes

Roseanne: [to D.J] Hey! Black people are just like us. They're every bit as good as us, and any people who don't think so is just a bunch of banjo-picking, cousin-dating, barefoot embarrassments to respectable white-trash like us!

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Roseanne: You're kissing that girl, you're doing the play, and that's all there is to it!

D.J.: Well Dad said I didn't have to, and Dad outranks you!

Roseanne: [pause] Are you *new*?

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Dan Conner: I hate white people.

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Dan Conner: He was raised in Lanford, it's 5% blacks, and kissing's a new thing for him. It's only natural that D.J. wouldn't be as comfortable kissing a black girl as one of his own, I did not say that!

Roseanne: Well at least now I know where he gets it from.

Dan Conner: I am not a bigot.

Roseanne: Yeah and neither's your father, he says he doesn't have any problem with the coloreds.

Dan Conner: I am not my father.

Roseanne: If I had known you'd be passing your family's crap onto my kids I wouldn't be having another one with you.

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Dan Conner: Is it because she's black?

D.J.: You'll be mad if I say yes.

Dan Conner: No we won't.

Roseanne: Yes we will!

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Chuck Mitchell: So, what's with the extra poker game this week? Did Roseanne finally come to her senses and leave ya?

Dan Conner: Believe me, if Roseanne left me, you'd all be a lot prettier, and the opening bid would be two panties.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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