[on a busy night at the hospital, a podiatrist is sent to Mac and Quon Le's hospital room, while she is in labor]
Doctor Aidleman: Good lord, this woman is pregnant!
Christine Sullivan: Oh, don't tell me you've never delivered a baby before?
Doctor Aidleman: [sarcastic] Well, just how many people who *aren't* obstetricians have?
[Raised hands from Christine, Harry, Mac, Bull, and Dan]
Doctor Aidleman: What are you? Some kind of a cult?
[swearing in a group of new citizens]
Judge Harry Stone: You've all gone through a lot to reach here. You've learned our history, our culture, our secret handshake...
Judge Harry Stone: Well, you have learned our secret handshake, haven't you?
[more confused murmuring]
Judge Harry Stone: Ha-ha-ha! No, there's no secret handshake! I was just kidding!
Clinton: I stuffed myself into the dashboard of a Datsun to get here, and he's *kidding*?
Roz: It's his inalienable right to make an ass of himself.
Vega: God, he's good!
Roz: What do you do for a living?
Clinton: Before I came to the US, president.
Roz: Of what company?
Clinton: I was president of my country.
Roz: You were president of an entire country?
Clinton: Until the revolution. Officially my title was President for Life, First Minister, Defender of the Constitution, Prince Regent, and Protector of the Realm.
Roz: And now?
Clinton: Night manager of a 7 Eleven.