Jimmy James: I have a system. Always bet against any team that Ted Turner owns. That's what he does.
Lisa: Are you nervous about that speech tonight?
Dave: No, I'm cool.
Lisa: You're cool?
Dave: Yeah, I'm fine. I'm cool. I'm just... I'm, you know... chillin'.
Lisa: Well, word to your mother.
Bill McNeal: I hear you're opening for the great one.
Dave: Tell me, where do you get your misguided confidence?
Bill McNeal: Not confidence, Dave. Experience. I have spoken in front of dozens of fraternal organizations across this great land of ours.
Bill McNeal: Shriners, Lions clubs, Elk lodges. It's like I'm their king or something.
Dave: A kingdom of fat men in little cars. You must be very proud.
Bill McNeal: Do I hear the plaintive cry of the crested North American quitter?
Lisa: [Dave has locked his office door] He never locks the door. What is he doing in there?
Joe Garrelli: Maybe he's doing it with Lisa... Sorry. Force of habit.