When Piers announces he is getting married to someone ...



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Episode cast overview:
Sarah B'Stard
Leonie Mellinger ...
Randal Herley ...
Mr. Mumford
Dorothea Phillips ...
Mrs. Mumford
Neil Daglish ...
Heather Tobias ...
Woman in Church
Michael Branwell ...


Piers is marrying the attractive and dominant Clarissa and asks B'stard to be his best man. Clarissa ends up having sex with B'stard though she is critical of his technique and makes it clear that after her marriage to Piers she will do all she can to stop B'stard using him as his lackey. B'stard then makes several attempts to kill Clarissa though they all fail and the wedding goes ahead. B'stard however has the last laugh by ensuring that all the guests go down with food poisoning. Written by don @ minifie-1

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Release Date:

19 February 1989 (UK)  »

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User Reviews

Alan meets his match!
30 November 2010 | by (Ambrosia) – See all my reviews

Piers announces his forthcoming wedding to Clarissa Mumford ( Leonie Mellinger ). Alan treats the news as a joke. "Didn't know Quasimodo had a sister!". But Clarissa is no hunchback. She is beautiful, of blue blood, rides a motorbike, and knows a thing or two about karate. She humiliates Alan sexually, then announces her intention to take Piers away from Alan's control. Afraid of losing the one person he can rely on, Alan contemplates murder...

A good episode this, with Alan facing up to an irresistible challenge. Celia Imrie reprises her role as Mrs.Thatcher's spinsterish secretary Hilary Sissons' from the previous year's Comic Relief Special. She and Alan had a fling at the office Christmas party, and she has come back for more. Alan is on a committee for the safe disposal of old food, a plot point whose importance becomes clear at the end. Neil Daglish plays 'Keith', Clarissa's transvestite brother.

Although Clarissa survives the episode, she is not seen again, though referred to from time to time.

Funniest moment - Alan and Sarah are driving along a country lane when they encounter two people on horseback. Thinking them to be a couple of yokels, Alan beeps the horn and yells abuse. He scares the horses so much the woman rider ( Dorothea Phillips ) falls off and lands on the emblem on his car!

Second funniest moment - Alan giving the guests salmonella-infested food at the wedding reception!

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