- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: RIO?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Radar Intercept Officer. Also called a GIBs, one B, short for Guy In Back.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Why do you need two Bs?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Second one's for bastard.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [speaking of Martinez] Since it was his hottie working here, you should have looked into him.
- Richard Owens: You're right, sir.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Do not "sir" me, I work for a living.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I know what this is, boss.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Uh... external fuel tank?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Uh, 370 gallon external fuel tank off an F-14 Tomcat. A few were converted into camera or cargo pods. This one's a cargo pod.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: I'm impressed.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Didn't become an NCIS agent yesterday, Kate. As a matter of fact, tomorrow is...
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: It'll have been two years.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: That's kind of touching, Gibbs. Remembering the day you hired me.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Yeah, well, seemed like a good idea at the time.
- Abby Sciuto: You went to see Ducky before you came to see me!
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Is there some kind of priority here I don't know about?
- Abby Sciuto: A girl likes to be thought of first.
- Abby Sciuto: [walking into the morgue] Fore!
- [Ducky ducks]
- Dr. Donald Mallard: Never do that again.
- Abby Sciuto: [laughing] I'm sorry. I didn't know you were going to get all freaked out.
- Dr. Donald Mallard: Well, it's an automatic reflex when one is a golfer, Abigail.
- Abby Sciuto: Please don't call me "Abigail."
- Dr. Donald Mallard: Then don't yell "fore" when I have a niblick in my hand.
- Abby Sciuto: A niblick? Sounds like a sex act.
- Dr. Donald Mallard: Yes, that's what I thought it was the first time I heard the term. A niblick is what a nine iron used to be called when golf was the province of Scottish nobles, not the democratic "lovely walk spoiled" by the weekend duffer.
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You want to give me the names of the Tomcat crew.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Safe to assume one was Lt. Schilz.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Why ride in a pod when you have a seat in the cockpit?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Pilot was Lt. Commander Farnsworth.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: Good news, Commander, it took 10 years but we located your luggage.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Tony, what time did the schmuck's report say the dispersing office was robbed?
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: What schmuck?
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Well, our schmuck, unfortunately.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: That tank came off a Tomcat, somebody filed a TFOA report.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: TFOA?
- Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Things Falling off Aircraft.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: You're kidding.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: No, that's what they're called. Squadrons kept files on them going back to biplanes.
- Dr. Donald Mallard: It can't be 8 years. No I know is wasn't. Four years ago, your 3rd wife hit you over the head with a baseball bat and I distinctly remember the ant-eaten marine on that table there when I stitched you up.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Bounce?
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: It's a film. Ben Affleck gives up his seat on this flight for a guy who needs to get home. The plane crashes, the guy dies. He looks up the widow, Gwyneth Paltrow. He means to tell her the story but by the time they come around to it, they've fallen in love and he's afraid if he tells her, it'll ruin it.
- Randy Wiles: That's what happened to me.
- Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd: I believe him.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Of course you believe him, it's a chick flick. In a guy flick, you steal the money, you set Lt. Schilz up to take the fall, you murder him and you marry his wife.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Did you remove the flight bag?
- Deer Hunter: Yeah.
- Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Touch anything else?
- Deer Hunter: Not after I saw King Tut.