The Muppet Show (TV Series)
Avery Schreiber (1976)
Richard Hunt: Scooter, Statler, Sweetums, Wayne, Gorgon Heap, Pig Dancers, Catgut
Quotes
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Miss Piggy : Scooter, Scooter? Oh, dear nephew of the theater owner?
Scooter : Well, yes, Miss Piggy?
Miss Piggy : Would you do Miss Piggy a favor?
Scooter : Oh, sure. Why not?
Miss Piggy : Ahem. Well, you may have noticed, I have given my love to Kermit. You may also have noticed his reluctance in returning same.
Scooter : Oh, so you want me to get your love from Kermit and give it back to you. Oh, okay, where does he keep it?
Miss Piggy : Amusing little twit, isn't he? NO, BONEHEAD! I WANT YOU TO MAKE HIM JEALOUS!
Scooter : Ah, I see.
Miss Piggy : I want you to tell him that Avery Schreiber is simply mad about me.
Scooter : Oh, you want me to lie.
Miss Piggy : Just do it.
Scooter : And if I refuse?
Miss Piggy : Well, then I will karate chop you until the only thing you'll be able to go for... IS DOWN FOR THE COUNT!
Scooter : Uh, one jealous frog coming up.
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Miss Piggy : Aw, Kermit, my love, my life, I am sorry if Avery made you jealous.
Kermit the Frog : Uh, Fozzie Bear, stand by!
Scooter : Fozzie Bear, stand by!
Miss Piggy : Well, you are jealous, aren't you?
Scooter : Fozzie, stand by!
Kermit the Frog : Uh, no, I'm not.
Miss Piggy : But why?
Scooter : Uh, Fozzie, stand by!
Kermit the Frog : Well, Scooter told me it was all a trick.
Miss Piggy : Scooter, stand by! Hiii-ya!
[karate-chops Scooter and kicks him away]
