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"The Muppet Show" Candice Bergen (TV Episode 1976) Poster

(TV Series)

(1976)

Quotes

Waldorf: I think I should see a doctor.

Statler: Why do you say that?

Waldorf: I'm beginning to like the show.

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Candice Bergen: Kermit, he ate my camera.

Kermit: You're lucky. Last week he ate the guest.

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Kermit: My profile has been compared to Barrymore.

Sweetums: Yeah, Ethel Barrymore.

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Candice Bergen: She was so unsophisticated, she thought Marcello Mastroianni was an Italian soup.

[entire panel laughs hysterically except for Sam]

Sam the American Eagle: You mean it isn't an Italian soup?

Mildred: And he calls himself a world traveler?

Sam the American Eagle: No, now wait, I have been to restaurants where I've ordered Marcello Mastroianni, and I've gotten it.

Candice Bergen: Really? What did you get?

Sam the American Eagle: A swarthy, good-looking man sitting in a bowl. I always send him back.

Candice Bergen: What do you get when you order a Russian dressing? Rudolf Nureyev putting on his tights?

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Miss Piggy: Kermit, do you notice that every time we have a beautiful girl on the show, you forget about me?

Kermit: Uh, yeah, well, we could have a seal act on the show, and I might forget about you.

Miss Piggy: He tries so desperately to hide his love for me.

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Fozzie Bear: Hey, question: What has 1,000 legs but can't walk? Five hundred pairs of pants!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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