Babbitt: But don't let me catch you keeping a real werewolf in here!
Mike: Davy, you and Peter go hide in the bedroom.
Davy: He already knows about us, it's the horse we got to hide.
Mike: [feeding soup to a horse] Hey, I think he likes it.
Peter: At least somebody appreciates good soup.
Micky: Hey, wait till you see a horse change into a werewolf.
Dr. Mann: You have a very sick horse here.
Mike: Oh, eh, Dr. Mann, you don't understand.
Dr. Mann: Please don't explain, there's no time to waist, I may have to operate.
Peter: [dressed as the front end of a horse] You can't operate. I'm not a horse, I'm a Monkee.
Dr. Mann: Hahaha, A likely story. I suppose you sing, too?
Davy: [dressed as the back end of a horse] Yeah, both of us in here do.
Dr. Mann: Egad, it's even worse than I thought. This horse not only has delusions of singing, it has a split personality!
Farmer Fisher: [Coming into the barn ringing a big Triangle shouting] It's Tuesday morning! Got a lotta work to be done: gotta feed the hogs, gotta plow the south forty, gotta milk the cows, gotta feed the chickens. Come on boys, come on.
Mike: Come on, we gotta go... plow the cow...
Micky: Something about... I'm supposed to go milk the chicken?
Peter: I think we ought to go to feed the south porty.
Davy: Feed the chickens to the cows.
Mike: Hi, I'm the fella that called before.
Dr. Mann: Where's the monkey?
Mike: Oh, I'm the Monkee.
Dr. Mann: You're the monkey? You don't need a vet, young man, you need a psychiatrist!
Mike: No, wait a minute, you don't, you don't understand. I'm not a real monkey, I'm the kind of Monkee that sings!