- Archie MacDonald: [the guests for the wedding don't like bagpipes] The customer is always right.
- Golly Mackenzie: The customer is a cloth-eared loon.
- [first lines]
- Katrina: Fergal. How did you get in?
- Fergal: The usual way. Through the front door.
- Katrina: I'm not sure if I approve of you sneaking in here and making me breakfast.
- Fergal: I know.
- Katrina: I'm the headmistress of the local school; I've got my reputation to think of.
- Fergal: Sweetheart, we're five miles from the nearest town and hundreds of miles from civilization. Who's even going to know I'm here?
- [last lines]
- Katrina: Look after Archie for me, OK? I hope you two will be very happy together.
- Lexie: There is no 'us two'. Not the way you mean. What you saw the other day was just... we're both a bit lost. Need a bit of reassurance; that's all. Not that I wouldn't mind if we did. Someday. Maybe after you're gone. I'm not catching him on the rebound. Good luck to you too, OK.
- Katrina: See ya.
- Archie: [about Lexie's mother, Pamela] She envies your... independence, your self-reliance, your self-assurance. And your looks.
- Lexie: Stop it, Arch!
- Archie: OK.
- Lexie: No, go on!
- Archie: I mean it, Lexie, you are everything that she wants to be. I know you had a terrible childhood and I can't begin to imagine it, but you're you, in spite of all your... disadvantages. And that just makes you more amazing.
- Lexie: Thanks, Arch; you're a very sweet man. In spite of all your... advantages.
- Archie: Come on.
- [they hug]
- Archie: Now. No more talk about leaving Glenbogle, OK? You are wanted here.
- Lexie: What for? You're a better cook than I am.
- Archie: For your... Lexieness.
- Lexie: Wanted by whom?
- Archie: By everyone.
- Lexie: Including you?
- Archie: Especially me.
- [they kiss]
- Golly Mackenzie: I can do requests. Give me a tune, an'thing you like.
- Archie MacDonald: Can you play Far, Far Away?
- Hector MacDonald: Never heard of this chap Morton. One of thouse nouveau riche Johnnies, I suppose. Make all their money out of arms dealing and pornography.
- Archie: Whereas we made ours from stealing sheep and subjugating the peasants.
- Hector MacDonald: She's got a mind like a midden and a mouth like a Highland bog... and I like her already.
- Hector MacDonald: It's time the local brats got out of this bible-thumping back water. Every Sunday they're dragged off to church and barraged about Hell and damnation. No wonder they grow up to be superstitious buffoons. Do them good to get away from all that religious twaddle.