Pete: Jack, having you as a friend is a little bit like owning a pet disease.
MacGyver: [voice-over narration] Three and a half weeks. Two continents, five countries, one island, about nine thousand miles and I was wasted. Right now, I was looking forward to miles and miles of nothing happening, except sleep.
Pete: We can't break in. We've got to get in somehow. We've got to sneak in...
Jack: Disguised as what? Mother Theresa and a leper?
Liane Auber: [regarding her valuable jewellery] Did you see them on television?
MacGyver: Oh yeah.
Liane Auber: And what did you think?
MacGyver: I think it's kind of a flashy way of telling people you're rich.
MacGyver: Well. Sorry to bust in on you like this.
Pete: What kept ya?
Jack: Are we great or what. What a team and since we're already all here together, I heard about this sunken treasure. Fifty million dollars in Nazi gold. See, this ship was torpedoed right off the coast and the gold was lost. All we gotta do is get a diving bell and three bathing suits and...