After placing an order for 5,000 tongue depressors, the 4077th receives 500,000. Hawkeye decides to use every single one of them to erect a monument to Army inefficiency, and dedicate it to all the brave men and women who have passed through, while Klinger presses his luck when he starts a printing press. Written by
Klinger decides to create a camp newspaper, MASH notes. He sells subscriptions and enlists people in the unit to write for him. His tactics are over the top. Meanwhile, instead of 5000 tongue depressors being sent to the 4077, 500,000 arrive instead. Hawkeye decides it's a metaphor for all the young people who have been through the camp. He decides to use the sticks to build a monument. Suddenly, he achieves some celebrity and finds that this kind of publicity isn't all that great. A reporter and his cameraman come and try to use his monument as a recruiting tool. This is the last thing that Pierce wants. Klinger continues but unfortunately he is a little hasty in his editing and proofreading.
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