- Larry Sanders: [Stevie is promoting an episode where Ellen DeGeneres comes out as a lesbian] All right, look, you know, I think we're avoiding one little question here: what if she's not a lesbian? Did you guys ever think of that?
- Stevie Grant: Oh, man, I- she's a lesbian, I can tell, right? I've had sex with a lesbian.
- Arthur: So you had sex with a lesbian. You gotta have sex with two lesbians, that's the whole point.
- Sid: Just because you make more money than me doesn't mean you're my fucking boss.
- Phil: Are you nuts?
- Sid: I worked for Bob Hope. You should be kissing my ass that I even print your shit.
- Phil: Then why do they pay a thousand times what you make? A hundred pick?
- Sid: It's five times...
- [throws a paper on the desk]
- Phil: Christ, this is the budget! Where did you get this?
- Sid: From my ass.
- Phil: Look what the best boy makes, he doesn't deserve that. Where are you going?
- Sid: I'm gonna give him some shit.
- Phil: [interrupting a meeting] I need to make more money.
- Beverly Barnes: Phil...
- Phil: What? Oh oh I'm sorry, I just said that out loud? I was saying that over my head and I guess that one just slipped out.
- Beverly Barnes: Yes, it slipped out alright, so why don't you try to slip back in?
- Arthur: Listen, we're having a meeting here, you two.
- Larry Sanders: Phil, what do you think about Ellen?
- Phil: I'd like to make what she makes.