"I'm Alan Partridge" A Room with an Alan (TV Episode 1997) - Philip Fox as Estate Agent

Alan Partridge : [expanding a dining table] Yes, it's an extender! Fantastic. That is the icing on the cake. You know, if King Arthur had an extender on his table.

Estate Agent : Would have been a different story, really.

Alan Partridge : Well, it wouldn't have been round.
[Alan is being shown around a new house]

Estate Agent : Living room.

Alan Partridge : Oh, I like this. Yes. Certainly enough room to swing a cat in here, isn't there?

Estate Agent : Could swing a tiger in here, really!

Alan Partridge : You could, couldn't you, yes. Wouldn't want to, though. Not unless it had been stunned. Even then it's going to weigh the best part of a ton.
Alan Partridge : I do like that toilet. It's very futuristic, isn't it? Very, sort of, high-tech, space age. I can imagine Buck Rogers taking a dump on that. In the twenty-first century. Mind if I... have a go?

Estate Agent : Sure. Help yourself.

[pause]

Alan Partridge : Uh, have a go on the loo?

[another short pause then the estate agent realises what Alan wants]

Estate Agent : Oh, sorry! Sorry. Yes.

Alan Partridge : I prefer to go alone.

Estate Agent : [leaving] Sure, sure!

Alan Partridge : [shutting the door] Most times.

[cut to the lounge downstairs, the estate agent and Lynn are waiting in silence for Alan. Alan then bursts in through the double doors]

Alan Partridge : It flushed on the first yank! I love this house.

Philip Fox: Estate Agent