Lorelai: I can't believe you're going to a therapist. You know, they're totally going to ask you about me.
Lorelai: They always want to ask about your mother. It's okay. Say whatever you want. But make sure you start with "my mother's very hot".
Rory: Yes, that won't seem at all disturbing to the doctor.
Dr. Shapiro: You were arrested with your boyfriend?
Rory: Yes, I was.
Dr. Shapiro: Tell me about that.
Rory: About what? He was my boyfriend then and now he's not.
Dr. Shapiro: He's not?
Rory: No, he's not, we broke up. No, oh no, I'm sorry, HE broke up, I thought that we were just taking some time, but apparently, I'm a moron!
Dr. Shapiro: This is Logan?
Rory: What you have his name too? Super! Do you also have the picture of him hijacking me in my hallway earlier today?
Dr. Shapiro: I'm sorry, what?
Rory: I mean, how fair is that? He's gone, and then he shows up out of the blue, 'You cant live here, this place is a dump, and by the way, I love you!' I love you? Is he serious?
Dr. Shapiro: I don't know.
Rory: Nothing, for weeks! And then he just decides that he loves me?
Rory: So what happens now? I get another Birkin bag? And how long until he doesn't love me again, huh? I stole a boat with him! I never stole a boat with Dean!
Dr. Shapiro: Who's Dean?
Rory: My married ex-boyfriend who I lost my virginity to!
Dr. Shapiro: Wow.
Rory: Yeah, I'm a treat! I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't think I can take running into him every day in the halls, and in the paper and the coffee cart... Oh my god! I'm gonna have to quit drinking coffee! And I love coffee!
Rory: I really love coffee!
Anna Nardini: Hey, Luke! You happy?
Luke Danes: Yeah.
Anna Nardini: Me too, it's pretty cool, isn't it?
Luke Danes: Yeah, it is.
[describing their choices of entertainment in Las Vegas]
Lorelai: Well, it came down to Journey without their original lead singer, INXS without their original lead singer, Queen without their original lead singer, The Supremes without Diana and, weirdly, the James Brown Band without James Brown.
Rory: But we wound up seeing Tony Danza, who was sublime!
Lorelai: Oh, the tap dancing!
Anna: We'd already broken up by the time I found out and I knew how you felt about kids.
Luke: What do you mean, "how I felt about kids"?
Anna: You hate kids!
Luke: I don't hate kids!
Anna: What are you talking about?
Luke: I don't!
Anna: We couldn't go to the movies before 10 o'clock at night in case there were kids in the theatre.
Anna: You would flip out if you saw a woman breastfeeding in public, you couldn't stand to watch diaper commercials, and you had an unnatural hatred of Macaulay Culkin.
Luke: OK, fine, I hated kids, but I'm not that guy anymore.
Anna: Thirteen years ago you were that guy.
Paris Geller: It's going to be a great term, people. An important term. A term to change the history of the Yale Daily News. The work will be hard. It has to be hard. Nothing less than perfect will be tolerated. Please remember that I am your editor. I am not your mother, or your hugger. If you need some love, get a hooker. If you're having a bad day, find a ledge or way to deal. My door is not open to you, ever. You have five minutes to enjoy your cookies. Welcome to the Yale Daily News.