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"Gilmore Girls" Take the Deviled Eggs... (TV Episode 2002) Poster

Quotes

Rory Gilmore: You want catharsis?

Lorelai Gilmore: Yes.

Rory Gilmore: I know what'll do it for you.

Lorelai Gilmore: What?

Rory Gilmore: Jess' car.

Lorelai Gilmore: What?

Rory Gilmore: We egg Jess' car. It's perfect!

Lorelai Gilmore: Are you serious?

Rory Gilmore: No one's around. It's just sitting there.

Lorelai Gilmore: Rory, if rearranging Sherry's medicine cabinet is immature, what's this?

Rory Gilmore: Off the chart!

Lorelai Gilmore: We can't egg his car.

Rory Gilmore: Sure we can.

Lorelai Gilmore: Doose's is closed and we don't have any eggs at home.

[Rory holds up the leftover devil's eggs]

Lorelai Gilmore: You want to devil egg Jess' car?

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Taylor Doose: The bottom line is that too many birds are landing atop the streetlights and relieving themselves on helpless passersby. And I daresay that some of these birds seem to be doing it on purpose.

Babette Dell: You get dumped on, Taylor?

Taylor Doose: It's not just me.

Luke Danes: Hey, if anybody has a picture of Taylor getting dumped on, I'll pay top dollar.

Kirk Gleason: I'll check the internet.

Miss Patty: Taylor, all animals have to... you know. How are you gonna stop birds from doing that?

Taylor Doose: Easy. You put sharp metal spikes on the top of the fixtures. Then when they land, pow! They're shish kebab!

Rory Gilmore: That's cruel.

Babette Dell: You can't do that.

Andrew: I'd rather have bird crap fall on my head.

Lorelai Gilmore: There it is, our new town slogan.

Rory Gilmore: I like it.

Lorelai Gilmore: I see coffee mugs, T-shirts.

Rory Gilmore: Don't forget the stuffed shish-kebab birds.

Lorelai Gilmore: That moan when you squeeze them!

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Luke Danes: What can I get you Kirk?

Kirk Gleason: Patty melt and a coke.

Luke Danes: You want the melt cut into squares or stars today?

Kirk Gleason: Half and half.

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Luke Danes: [about Jess' new car] He paid you for it, right?

Gypsy: Nothing's free at Gypsy's.

Luke Danes: And he paid cash?

Gypsy: Mostly twenties.

Luke Danes: Did you make sure Andrew Jackson was on the bills, not Alfred E. Neuman or someone?

Gypsy: Looked real to me.

Luke Danes: Well when he took the money out of wherever he had it, did a mask or a gun fall out?

Gypsy: No, but he was carrying it in a canvas bag with a big dollar sign on it.

Luke Danes: Really?

Gypsy: No.

Luke Danes: Good.

Gypsy: Guys are stupid.

Luke Danes: What?

Gypsy: You strip your gears, ride your brakes. And if we don't laugh after we make a joke, you think we're serious.

Jackson Belleville: [from off camera] I don't ride my brakes!

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Sherry Tinsdale: Green is the new pink!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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