Bender: Wiggles, weren't you about to propose a toast to your gallant captain?
Fry: Fine, I've got a toast. To Captain Bender, he's the best... at being a big jerk who's stupid and his big ugly face is as dumb as a butt!
Bender: Eh, I've heard better.
Leela: They're so cute. They're like if puppies and kittens could have babies.
Leela: [looking at the overcrowded penguins] Oh God, it's inhuman! It's like Hong Kong!
Fry: What happened?
Dr. Zoidberg: All six thousand hulls have been breached.
Fry: Oh, the fools! Why didn't they build it with six thousand and one hulls? When will they learn?
Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth: Being a captain is about intuition and heart. A good captain can't have either one. That's why cold, logical Bender is the perfect candidate for the job.
Bender: Well, I do think of human life as expendable.
Dr. Zoidberg: Now, if you'll excuse me, there is some ravioli on the floor with only two footprints on it.
[Bender passes by]
Dr. Zoidberg: Three footprints.
[Drops on floor and starts eating noisily]
Free Waterfall Senior: If rubbing permafrost on your crotch is wrong, man, I don't want to be right.
Leela: And Bender, that aerosol head spray makes your antenna smell nice...
Bender: Thank you.
Leela: ...But it's doing long-term damage to the planet.
Bender: So? It's not like it's the only one we've got.
Leela: Why do we have to resort to non-violence? Can't we just kick their asses?
Free Waterfall Senior: Now, little lady, those people's asses are living things too.
Leela: Why weren't you kong donkeys outside cleaning up?
Dr. Zoidberg: They sent us inside for doing an unsatisfactory job... and eating penguin eggs.
Fry: You ate most of them.
Free Waterfall Senior: Look, nobody enjoys shooting penguins, but it you have to shoot penguins, well, you might as well enjoy it.
Fry: No fair! Leela was training me to be captain. She even let me sit in her lap and steer... in this comic I drew.
Dr. Zoidberg: [Grabs comic] Ooh, the new one's out.
Leela: [aims at penguins] It's just like murdering little butlers.