Monica: Phoebe and Gary think they're the hotter couple. So, to prove them wrong we have to go and have a ton of sex.
Chandler: Monica, you've got to stop this competitiveness. Just to prove them wrong you want me to go up stairs and have sex with you over, and over, and over, and I'm saying no to this why? Get your coat!
[Monica creeps up on Chandler, in the men's room]
Monica: You know, Chandler, I've always found public men's rooms to be quite sexy. Haven't you?
Chandler: No. And, if I did, I don't think we would be seeing each other.
Monica: Hey, Rach, a guy from Ralph Lauren called. You got a second interview.
Rachel Green: Monica, that's not funny.
Monica: Oh, OK.
Monica: A guy from Ralph Lauren called you got a second interview.
Rachel Green: Oh, my God, Monica, you better be serious.
Monica: You just told me to be funny.
Chandler: Oh, my God. You know what just happened? You just freaked out about our relationship.
Monica: I did not.
Chandler: Yes, you did. Just admit it.
Monica: All right, all right. I admit it, I freaked out a little.
Chandler: A little? You freaked out *big time*. You know what just happened? I became the relationship master, and you turned into the bumbling screw-up. We have now switched places. Take that.
[Chandler does a victory dance, while Monica stares at him]
Chandler: [stops dancing] And, we're back to where we were...
Rachel Green: I remember he said something about a boat and I said, "well, yeah, if you got enough life jackets."
Rachel Green: [Joey and Chandler are silent]
Rachel Green: Trust me, it was very funny.
Phoebe Buffay: It's so unfair our date has to get short just cause some guy shot at a store clerk.
Gary: I know, but it's my job, sweetheart.
Phoebe Buffay: OK but maybe I could come too?
[Hears on police radio that suspect has emerged naked from the sewer]
Phoebe Buffay: Yeah alright, you go.