Joey Tribbiani: Anybody got a coat hanger?
Chandler: Oh, I do!
Chandler: Wait, no, I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning.
Monica Geller: So if your parents hadn't gotten divorced, you'd be able to answer a question like a normal person?
Chandler: [Ross and Rachel have exploded at each other] Hey everybody, guess what I am!
[Starts dancing and jumping around]
Phoebe: Hey, hey, HEY! Look what you're doing to Chandler!
Chandler: Oh, that's great, with my luck, that's gonna be him.
Phoebe: Him? Him Ross?
Chandler: No. Hymn 253, His Eyes Are on The Sparrow!
Phoebe: Aren't you gonna go?
Rachel Green: No, thank you.
Monica Geller: No, Rachel never pees in public restrooms.
Rachel Green: Well, they never have any paper in there, you know, so my rule is: "No tissue, no tushy."
Dr. Ross Geller: [after filling up the cab's gas tank] You're welcome.
Rachel Green: Oh, I'm sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someone else?
Rachel Green: [after Chandler has thrown his cigarette butt on the ground] Chandler, what are you doing? There is a trash can right there!
Chandler: Well, I thought if I littered, that crying Indian might come by and save us.
Joey Tribbiani: Hey, can you close that window, Chandler? My nipples could cut glass over here!
Phoebe: Wait, really? 'Cause mine get me outta tickets!