Quotes

[after the heist, Mal returns to the ship, butt-naked. The crew tries hard not to stare. Turning back to the desert landscape, he smiles, contently]

Mal: [closing the doors] Good day!

Simon: You're in a dangerous line of work, Jayne. Odds are you'll be under my knife again, often. So I want you to understand one thing very clearly: No matter what you do or say or plot, no matter how you come down on us, I will never, ever harm you. You're on this table, you're safe... 'cause I'm your medic. And however little we may like or trust each other, we're on the same crew. Got the same troubles, same enemies, and more than enough of both. Now, we could circle each other and growl, sleep with one eye open, but that thought wearies me. I don't care what you've done, I don't know what you're planning on doing, but I'm trusting you. I think you should do the same. 'Cause I don't see this working any other way.

[exits]

River: Also, I can kill you with my brain.

Mal: Yeah. That went well.

Inara: You call this going well?

Mal: We got the loot, didn't we?

Inara: Yes, but...

Mal: Then I call it a win. What's the problem?

Inara: Should I start with the part where you're stranded in the middle of nowhere or the part where you have no clothes?

Inara: What was the last cargo we snuck past the Alliance to transport?

Mal: That was...

Inara: What was the cargo?

Mal: [pauses] They were dolls.

Inara: They were little geisha dolls with big heads that wobbled!

Mal: Hey, people *loved* those!

Zoë: [about Saffron and her plan] But Inara ain't wrong. She can't be trusted.

Mal: I ain't asking you to trust her. I'll be with her on the inside the whole time.

Saffron: See there? All you gotta do to be a rich woman, hon, is get over it.

[smiles]

Zoë: [smiles back] Okay.

[punches Saffron in the face]

Zoë: I'm in.

Mal: How about I stay out of your whoring...

Inara: Well, that didn't take long.

Mal: You keep out of my thieving?

[walking in on Saffron pointing a gun at Mal, who is standing there holding Durran's historical laser pistol artifact]

Durran Haymer: Now I'm intruding.

Saffron: Durran, this isn't what it looks like.

Mal: Unless it looks like we're stealing your priceless Lassiter, 'cause, that's what we're doin'. Don't ask me 'bout the gun, though, 'cause that's new.

Durran Haymer: Well, I appreciate your honesty. Not, you know, a lot, but...

Jayne: That's crazy talk.

Simon: Then let's talk crazy.

Mal: [sitting naked in the desert] Yeah.

[pause]

Mal: That went well.

Mal: Monty! *You* have fallen from our noble bachelor ranks?

Zoë: Sweetie, if he had a tussle with that Sasquatch, we'd all be in the dirt right about now... scoopin' up the captain's teeth - Ain't that so, sir?

Mal: Heard you were looking for me?

Inara: I was. Care to sit? I was hoping to talk a little business. Would you like some tea?

Mal: Okay, what's the game?

Inara: I offered you tea.

Mal: After inviting me into your shuttle of your own free will, which makes two events without precedent and which makes me more'n a little skittish.

Inara: Honestly, Mal, if we can't be civilized and talk like...

Mal: I'm plenty civilized. You're using wiles on me.

Inara: I'm using what?

Mal: Your feminine wiles. Your companion training, your some-might-say uncanny ability to make a man sweaty and/or compliant, of which I have had just about enough today.