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(TV Series)

(1987)

Quotes

Edward Catflap: [During a brainstorming session to come up with a new idea for an advert] I've always thought that Corn Flakes look a bit like people.

Richard Rich: [sighs] And after briefly dipping his toe in the waters of reason, the man with no brain happily retreats to frollic on Insanity beach.

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Richard Rich: [off screen] Oh, I'm stretched on the rack of my own genius!

Ralph Filthy: And what is wrong with the boy Richie?

Edward Catflap: Well, he's trying to write a novel but he keeps on coming up against the same huge lack of talent.

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Richard Rich: Despairing of modern technology, I allowed my genius to flow through a simple, old fashioned medium. I dug out me old ballpoint.

Edward Catflap: Oo-er.

Richard Rich: Please Eddie, I'm not in the mood.

Ralph Filthy: So you have written a nov then?

Richard Rich: Better. I have mastered the highest and most complex art form known to man: I have perfected a game show formula.

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Richard Rich: This is my minder, Edward Catflap.

Jumbo Whiffy: Terrific, terrific, well look, go get yourselves in there and we'll have a drink, you pair of old tarts.

[laughs and slaps Richie on the back as he pushes him in]

Edward Catflap: Don't mind if we do, you rectum-faced bucket of sex sauce.

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Jumbo Whiffy: You've met Jill, I take it? I don't know what I'd do without her, terrific pair of eh... eyes, eh?

[indicating her bosom with his hands as he laughs]

Richard Rich: Yeah, and fantastic knockers as well, hasn't she?

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Jumbo Whiffy: Richie, let me put it this way: when I first came into this office, there was a fat old drunk sat behind that desk mumbling platitudes. And it was me. And I'm still there. You see the way I'm thinking, Richard?

Richard Rich: Yes.

Edward Catflap: No.

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Richard Rich: Selina Scott! Am I forever to be surrounded by poltroons?

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Edward Catflap: Er, well, err, well... I've always thought... that cornflakes... look a bit like people...

Richard Rich: And after briefly dipping his toe in the waters of reason, the man with no brain, happily retreats to frolic on insanity beach!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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