Along with his rival Father Dick Byrne Ted is encouraged to write a song to represent Ireland at the Eurovision Song Contest and comes up with the dreadful 'My Lovely Horse' but when it is derided he plans to substitute his version of an obscure Norwegian song whose writers are dead. Unfortunately the song proves to anything but obscure and very well-known so in desperation he reverts to 'My Lovely Horse'. Up against Dick Byrne's superior offering Ted's song is chosen, solely because the organizers want to lose to avoid staging the next year's costly show. At the song contest it gets 'Nil points' all round. Written by
don @ minifie-1
Did You Know?
Ireland went on to win the 1996 Eurovision Song Contest, with 'The Voice' sung by Eimear Quinn
. This was Ireland's record seventh win. See more
When Dougal plays his record, he puts the needle on and music plays, but it's clear the turntable is not moving. See more
Ready Ted? Let's do it!
Dougal, don't take it so seriously, it's just a bit of fun.
[some time later; Ted has smoked so many cigarettes the room is filled with smoke
Just play the f - king note!
The first one?
No not the f - king first one! The f - king first one's already f - king down! Just play the f - king note you were f - king playing earlier! I've been playing the f - king first one! We have the f - king first one!
The copyright year at the end is misprinted as MXMXCVI instead of MCMXCVI for the first six episodes of the second season. See more
I Love Paris
Written by Cole Porter
Performed by Dermot Morgan See more