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"Family Guy" There's Something About Paulie (TV Episode 2000) Poster

Quotes

Peter Griffin: Lois, what are you doing lying on the couch at this hour? Have you been drinking?

Lois Griffin: Peter, you know I never drink.

Peter Griffin: Oh yeah? Just like you never dodged the draft?

Lois Griffin: What are you talking about? I'm a woman.

Peter Griffin: Sure you are. Now.

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Stewie Griffin: [Upon learning that Lois is the target of a hitman] Oh dear, there are so many people to thank! God, of course, and umm... who else? Oh, this is so unexpected.

[Discreetly checks a list pulled from his pocket]

Stewie Griffin: Oh yes, SATAN!

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Peter Griffin: What do you want me to do, whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? 'Cause I'm married.

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Lois Griffin: Peter, did you get that thing taken care of.

Peter Griffin: That thing? Oh yeah, I had the doctor look at it.

[Cut to Peter at the doctor's office]

Dr. Hartman: Mr. Griffin, that's not a growth, that's your penis.

Peter Griffin: Oh, well what about the...?

Dr. Hartman: Testicles.

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Cleveland: Peter, you should never get involved with the mob.

Biff: Who do you think YOU are?

Cleveland: I happen to be the owner of this delicatessen.

Biff: Okay, well, butt out, Shlomo.

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Lois Griffin: Peter, how can we afford this?

Peter Griffin: Let's just say the car was a steal.

Lois Griffin: Say that again.

Peter Griffin: The car was a steal.

Lois Griffin: This time without winking.

Peter Griffin: The car was a steal. Wink.

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Peter's Car: Take left at fork in road. In Soviet Russia, road forks you!

Peter Griffin: Boy that's getting old.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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