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"Ellen" Splitsville, Man (TV Episode 1996) Poster

(TV Series)

(1996)

Quotes

Ellen: This cannot be real. I mean, I know it's a dream and I'm gonna wake up and you'll be there and you'll be there...

Joe Farrell: What about me, your old pal Joe?

Audrey: Ellen, I know exactly what's happening. She's going through the five stages of grief.

[loudly]

Audrey: ELLEN, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

Ellen: Yes, Audrey. I don't think that deafness is one of the stages.

Audrey: Okay. What you're going through is perfectly normal. You're in the first stage of grief, which is denial.

Ellen: If I could just change today I would do anything.

Audrey: Okay, now you're in stage three: bargaining. You completely skipped over anger.

Ellen: Shut up, Audrey!

Audrey: There it is!

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Margaret: Ellen? Ellen, where are you?

Ellen: [walks out of a coat closet] Here, I was in the closet.

Margaret: It's big, isn't it?

Ellen: Yeah, but I wouldn't want to spend a lot of time in there, entertaining or anything.

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Ellen: I want to know why. Why you're separating. There's got to be a reason.

Lois Morgan: I know you want some big answer like that I found your father in bed with another woman but it just didn't happen that way.

Harold Morgan: Amen to that. What happened was the other night, we were sitting in the kitchen eating some of your mom's famous broasted chicken and she looked up at me and she said, "What are we going to do for the rest of our lives?" I said, "I don't know." And that was it.

Lois Morgan: We just sort of... fell out of love I guess.

Ellen: So you fell out of love. You can fall back in love. It's like bell bottoms, wait 15 years it'll come back around again.

Harold Morgan: Honey, I wish there was some way we can make this easy for you, but we can't.

Ellen: This so out of nowhere. Put yourself in my shoes. What if I said something shocking to you like my whole life has been a lie, and I'm really... left-handed?

Lois Morgan: Oh God, you're a lefty?

Ellen: No I'm not...

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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