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- The Balladeer: [narrating] Now Lil' Cousin may be a Duke back on his planet, considering his knack for gettin' into trouble.
- Enos: This is deputy Enos Strate reportin'. I just spotted a UFO. A flying saucer just landed in Skunk Hollow!
- Daisy Duke: I dunno, maybe some beings from outer space are trying to get ahold of us.
- Cooter: Uh-huh.
- Luke Duke: They're gonna get a strange impression of humanity if they stop in Hazzard County.
- Cooter: Well, they probably just heard about the big dance Saturday night.
- Bo Duke: They're probably just... small planet folks.
- Cooter: They're comin' to the dance to do the Moonwalk.
- Daisy Duke: I know, why don't we call him 'Lil' Cousin'? Can we call you Lil' Cousin?
- [the alien warbles something which the Dukes take as an affirmative]
- The Balladeer: [narrating] Now Lil' Cousin may be a Duke back on his planet, considering his knack for gettin' into trouble.
- Elton Loggins: This is Elton Loggins, the voice of Hazzard County
- [snorts three times]
- Elton Loggins: And what a day! Whoowee!
- [cut to outside as the Dukes and the police scrables for their cars]
- Elton Loggins: Let me tell ya. Well first of all, there ain't no martians and second of all, them guys were phonies. You know, just like in the movies. Who can you trust? Elton Loggins
- [snorts three times]
- Elton Loggins: , the voice of Hazzard County!