Duckman: Private Dick/Family Man (TV Series)

Psyche (1994)

Jason Alexander: Eric Duckman

Quotes 

• Mistress Nina : Okay, so you have some problems.

  Eric Duckman : With women, actually.

  Mistress Nina : You're not sexually active?

  Eric Duckman : I'm VERY sexually active!

  Mistress Nina : With another person.

  Eric Duckman : Oh, uh, no.

• Eric Duckman : Cornfed... do you think I'm attractive?

  Cornfed Pig : Sorry Duckman, I don't date people I work with.

  Eric Duckman : No, spam-for-brains, I mean do you think there's anything wrong with my bill.

  Cornfed Pig : You mean the fact that it curves to one side, the nostrils don't match, it's covered with nicotine stains, acne scars, varicose veins, and it whistles when you chew?... I mean, no, nothing I can see.