Doctor Who (TV Series)

The Unquiet Dead (2005)

Simon Callow: Charles Dickens

Photos 

Quotes 

• Charles Dickens : What the Shakespeare is going on?

• Driver : [as the coach races down the road after the hearse]  Everything in order, Mr. Dickens?

  Charles Dickens : No it is not!

  The Doctor : What did he say?

  Charles Dickens : Let me say this first. I'm not without a sense of humor...

  The Doctor : Dickens?

  Charles Dickens : Yes?

  The Doctor : Charles Dickens?

  Charles Dickens : Yes.

  The Doctor : The Charles Dickens?

  Driver : Shall I remove the gentleman, Sir?

  The Doctor : Charles Dickens. You're brilliant you are! Completely one hundred per cent brilliant. I've read them all. "Great Expectation", "Olivier Twist", and whats the other one? The one with the ghost?

  Charles Dickens : "A Christmas Carol"?

  The Doctor : No, no, no. The one with the trains. "The Signalman". That's it. Terryfying, The best short story ever written! You're a genius!

  Driver : You want me to get rid of him, Sir?

  Charles Dickens : No, I think he can stay.

• Charles Dickens : But you have such knowledge of future times. I don't wish to impose on you, but I must ask you... My books, Doctor. Do they last?

  The Doctor : Oh, yes.

  Charles Dickens : How long?

  The Doctor : Forever.

• Charles Dickens : Can it be that I have the world entirely wrong?

  The Doctor : Not wrong. There's just more to learn.

  Charles Dickens : I've always railed against the fantasist. Oh, I loved an illusion as much as the next man, revelled in them. But that's exactly what they were. Illusions. The real world is something else. I dedicated myself to that, injustices, the great social causes. I hoped that I was a force for good. Now, you tell me that the real world is a realm of spectres and jack-o-lanterns. In which case, have I wasted my brief span here, Doctor? Has it all been for nothing?

• Charles Dickens : Incredible. Ghosts that are not ghosts, but beings from another world, who can only exist in our realm by inhabiting cadavers.

  The Doctor : Good system. It might work.

  Rose Tyler : [about the Gelf]  You can't let 'em run around inside of dead people!

  The Doctor : Why not? It's just like recycling.

  Rose Tyler : Seriously though, you can't.

  The Doctor : Seriously though, I can!

• Charles Dickens : Who exactly is in that hearse?

  The Doctor : My friend. She's only 19. It's my fault. She's in my care, and now she's in danger.

  Charles Dickens : Why are we wasting my time talking about dry old books? This is much more important.

  [leans out the window; shouting to the driver] 

  Charles Dickens : Driver, be swift! the chase is on!

  [driver answers 'Yes, sir] 

  The Doctor : [smiling]  That a boy, Charlie!

  Charles Dickens : Nobody calls me Charlie.

  The Doctor : [with a sly grin]  The ladies do.

  Charles Dickens : How do you know that?

  The Doctor : I told you, I'm your number one...

  Charles Dickens : Number one fan.

  [more to himself] 

  Charles Dickens : I know.

• The Doctor : [runs towards a coach; shouts to the driver]  Oi, you! Follow that hearse!

  Driver : I can't do that, Sir.

  The Doctor : [climbs in]  Why not?

  Charles Dickens : [having followed the Doctor]  I'll tell you why not!

  [stands at the door] 

  Charles Dickens : I'll give you a very good reason why not. Because this is *my* coach!

  The Doctor : Well, get in, then.

  [grabs his arm, pulling him inside, and slams the door] 

• Charles Dickens : After all these revelations, there's still one mystery you haven't explained. Answer me this... Who are you?

  The Doctor : Just a friend, passing through.

• The Doctor : I'm such a big fan.

  Charles Dickens : [stutters]  A what? A big what?

  The Doctor : Fan. Number 1 fan. That's me.

  Charles Dickens : How exactly are you a 'fan'? In what way do you resemble a means of keeping oneself cool?

• The Doctor : [saying goodbye to Charles Dickens]  Nice to meet you. Fantastic.

  Rose Tyler : [shaking his hand]  Bye then. And thanks.

  [steps forward and kisses him on the cheek] 

  Charles Dickens : [taken aback]  Oh, my dear... How modern.

  [Rose smiles] 

• [last lines] 

  Charles Dickens : God bless us, every one!

• The Gelth , Gwyneth : [during the séance, the Gelth come through]  Pity us. Pity the Gelth. There is so little time. Help us.

  The Doctor : What do you want us to do?

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : The rift. Take the girl to the rift. Make the bridge.

  The Doctor : What for?

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : We are so very few. The last of our kind. We face extinction.

  The Doctor : Why? What happened?

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : Once we had a physical form like you. But then the War came.

  Charles Dickens : War? What war?

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : The Time War. The whole universe convulsed. The Time War raged, invisible to smaller species but devastating to higher forms. Our bodies wasted away. We're trapped in this gaseous state.

  The Doctor : So, that's why you need the corpses.

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : We want to stand tall, to feel the sunlight, to live again. We need a physical form and your dead are abandoned. They go to waste. Give them to us.

  Rose Tyler : But we can't!

  The Doctor : Why not?

  Rose Tyler : It's... I mean, it's not...

  The Doctor : Not decent? Not polite? It could save their lives.

  The Gelth , Gwyneth : Open the rift. Let the Gelth through. We're dying. Help us... Pity the Gelth!

  [the Gelth vanish] 

• Gwyneth : [opening the door to The Doctor and Charles Dickens]  I'm sorry, sir. We're closed.

  Charles Dickens : Nonsense. Since when does an undertaker keep office hours? The dead don't die on schedule.

• Charles Dickens : On, on I go. Same old show. I'm like a ghost, condemned to repeat myself for all eternity.

  Stage Manager : It's never too late, sir. You could think up some new turns.

  Charles Dickens : No, I can't. Even my imagination grows stale.

  [drinks] 

  Charles Dickens : I'm an old man. Perhaps I've thought everything I'll ever think.

• Charles Dickens : [seeing a ghost taking over an old woman]  What sort of phantasmagoria is this?

• [surrounded by gas-infected zombies who are aiming to kill him] 

  Charles Dickens : Oh, my... I hope this theory is validated... soon. Almost instantly, in fact.

• The Doctor : [in reference to the gas creature circling overhead]  Did it say anything? Can it speak? I'm the Doctor, by the way.

  Charles Dickens : Doctor? You look more like a navvy.

  The Doctor : [tugging his sweater]  What's wrong with this jumper?

• Gabriel Sneed : I did the Bishop a favour, once. Made his nephew look like a cherub. Even though he'd been a fortnight in the weir. Perhaps he'll do us an exorcism on the cheap.

  [There is a knock at the door. Sneed and Gwyneth look up, alarmed. Sneed tells Gwyneth] 

  Gabriel Sneed : Say I'm not in. Tell them we're closed. Just, just get rid of them.

  [In the parlor, Rose is just waking up, and while trying to come to her senses, she does not see a gassy spirit enter Mr. Redpath's body, causing him to sit up in his coffin] 

  Gwyneth : [opening the door to find the Doctor and Charles Dickens]  I'm sorry, sir, we're closed.

  Charles Dickens : Nonsense! Since when did an undertaker keep office hours? The dead don't die on schedule. I demand to see your master.

  Gwyneth : He's not in, sir.

  Charles Dickens : [tries to force the door open as Gwyneth closes it]  Don't lie to me, girl!

  Gabriel Sneed : I'm awfully sorry, Mr. Dickens, but the mater's indisposed.

  [Behind her, a gas lamp flares up and the flames start flickering oddly] 

  The Doctor : Having trouble with your gas?

  Charles Dickens : What in Shakespeare is going on?

  Rose Tyler : [suddenly, she notices Mr. Redpath's corpse sitting up in his coffin as he making zombie noises]  Are you all right? You're kidding me, yeah? You're just kidding.

  [Redpath climbs out of his coffin] 

  Rose Tyler : You are, you're kidding me, aren't ya?

  [He takes staggering steps towards her] 

  Rose Tyler : Okay, not kidding!

  [She runs to the door and tries to open it. In the hallway, meanwhile, the Doctor has forced his way inside] 

  Gwyneth : You're not allowed inside, sir.

  The Doctor : There's something inside the walls.

  [Inside the parlor, the corpse of Mrs. Peace also sits up and climbs out of her coffin] 

  The Doctor : The gas pipes. Something's living inside the gas.

  [Desparate, Rose throws a vase at Mr. Redpath, but that only causes him to stumble back a bit. She then frantically rattles the doorknob] 

  Rose Tyler : Let me out! Open the door!

  The Doctor : [outside]  That's her.

  [He runs off to find her, Charles Dickens following him] 

  Rose Tyler : Please, let me out!

  [Mrs. Peace and Mr. Redpath are advancing on her. In the hall, the Doctor and Dickens race past Sneed] 

  Gabriel Sneed : How dare you, sir! This is my house!

  [Dickens charges past him too. He shakes his finger at Gwyneth as she runs after them] 

  Gabriel Sneed : I told you!

  Rose Tyler : [still hammering on the door as the two bodies close in on her]  Let me out! Somebody, open the door! Open the door!

  [Redpath clasps a hand over her mouth, muffling her scream. At that moment, the Doctor kicks the door in] 

  The Doctor : I think this is MY dance.

  [releases Rose from Mr. Redpath's grasp] 

  Charles Dickens : It's a prank? It must be. We're under some mesmeric influence.

  The Doctor : No, we're not, the dead are walking.

  [grins down at the panting Rose] 

  The Doctor : Hi!

  Rose Tyler : Hi! Who's your friend?

  The Doctor : Charles Dickens.

  Rose Tyler : Oh. Okay.

  The Doctor : [to the corpses]  My name's the Doctor. Who are you, then? What do you want?

  Redpath : [speaking with a voice overlaid by that of a ghost]  We're failing. Open the rift, we're dying. Trapped in this form, cannot sustain. Help us.

  [He and Mrs. Peace raise their heads to the ceiling, and the gas leaves them with a wailing shriek, and then the bodies fall to the floor] 

• [Gwyneth pours the Doctor, Rose, and Charles Dickens tea. Rose, meanwhile, is lashing out at Sneed for the events of the cadavers' attack] 

  Rose Tyler : First of all you drug me, then you kidnap me, and don't think I didn't feel your hands having a quick wander, you dirty old man!

  [the Doctor sniggers] 

  Gabriel Sneed : I won't be spoken to like this!

  Rose Tyler : Then you stuck me in a room full of zombies! And if that ain't enough, you swan off! And leave me to die! So come on, talk!

  Gabriel Sneed : It's not my fault, it's this house! It always had a reputation. Haunted. But I never had much bother until a few months back. And then the stiffs...

  [Dickens looks mildly offended] 

  Gabriel Sneed : ... the er, dear departed started getting restless.

  Charles Dickens : Tommyrot.

  Gabriel Sneed : You witnessed it! Can't keep the beggars down, sir! They walk. And it's the queerest thing that they hang on to scraps...

  Gwyneth : [giving the Doctor his tea]  Two sugars, sir, just how you like it.

  [the Doctor looks at her, retreating back curiously] 

  Gabriel Sneed : One old fella who used to be a sexton almost walked into his own memorial service! Just like the old lady going to your performance, sir! Just as she planned.

  Charles Dickens : Morbid fancy.

  The Doctor : Oh, Charles, you were there.

  Charles Dickens : I saw nothing but an illusion.

  The Doctor : If you're going to deny it, don't waste my time. Just shut up.

  [Dickens is stunned. The Doctor turns to Sneed] 

  The Doctor : What about the gas?

  Gabriel Sneed : That's new, sir, never seen anything like that.

  The Doctor : Means it's getting stronger, the rift's getting wider and something's sneaking through.

  Rose Tyler : What's the rift?

  The Doctor : A weak point in time and space. The connection between this place and another. That's the cause of ghost stories, most of the time.

  Gabriel Sneed : [with revelation]  That's how I got the house so cheap.

  [Dickens sneaks out of the room unnoticed] 

  Gabriel Sneed : Stories going back generations. Echoes in the dark. Queer songs in the air and this feeling like a... shadow. Passing over your soul. Mind you, truth be told, it's been good for business. Just what people expect from a gloomy old trade like mine.

• The Gelth : The bridge is open. We descend.

  [Suddenly, the figure becomes demonic. The gas turns from blue to red] 

  The Gelth : The Gelth will come through in force.

  Charles Dickens : You said that you were *few* in number!

  The Gelth : A few billion. And all of us in need of corpses.

  [the dead bodies, possessed by the Gelth, begin to rise] 

  Gabriel Sneed : Gwyneth! Stop this! Listen to your master! This has gone far enough. Stop dabbling, child, leave these things alone. I beg of you...

  Rose Tyler : Mr. Sneed! Get back!

  [But it's too late. A corpse strangles Sneed from behind, holding him still to let a Gelth fill his body through the mouth. The Doctor and Rose leap back, and when Sneed looks up again, it is through his blank, dead eyes] 

  The Doctor : I think it's gone a little bit wrong.

  Gabriel Sneed , The Gelth : I have joined the legions of the Gelth. Come. March with us.

  Charles Dickens : No!

  [the corpses start advancing on the Doctor and Rose] 

  Gabriel Sneed , The Gelth : We need bodies. All of you. Dead. The human race. Dead.

  The Doctor : Gwyneth, stop them! Send them back! Now!

  The Gelth : Three more bodies. Make them vessels for the Gelth.

  Charles Dickens : I - I can't! I'm sorry!

  [the Doctor and Rose spot the dungeon door and lock themselves into it]