Bill Larsen: There's my girl.
Cheryl Larsen: Hey, daddy!
Joel Larsen: Hey, Cheryl!
Cheryl Larsen: Yeah, right.
Bill Larsen: What's that smell?
Cheryl Larsen: It's perfume, daddy!
Joel: [voice over] It's bongwater, daddy!
Pat Brody: Do me a favor! Let's not tell her you're from the future. It'll be nice she doesn't know something for a change.
Joel Larsen: Only if you do something for me.
Pat Brody: You got it.
Joel Larsen: Tell me where the hell my next class is.
Joel Larsen: Who's that? She looks familiar.
Pat Brody: Lynn Pickett.
Joel Larsen: Oh, yeah! In fifth grade, she stole my magic markers. They were brand new. She had NO right!
Joel Larsen: I'm tired of always backing down. From fights, from bosses, just from life! I stand up for myself tomorrow night, I will stand up for myself from now on! And when the time comes, maybe my dad won't be disappointed in me. From this moment on, you're looking at the new Joel Larsen.
[throws the ball toward the hoop without looking at it, but the ball flies over the roof and breaks a window on top of it]
Joel Larsen: Damn! That would be cool.
Isabelle Meyers: You're not really going to fight Judd Chulak?
Joel Larsen: Damn right I am.
Isabelle Meyers: Get real! *I* can kick your ass!
Joel Larsen: Listen, when I get angry, Mr. Bicklesworth gets upset, and when Mr. Bicklesworth gets upset, PEOPLE DIE!
[hammers his hand at the table. Isabelle and even Pat looks confused]
Isabelle Meyers: I'm not even going to pretend to know what that means.
Joel Larsen: Dad. Can you teach me how to fight?
Bill Larsen: [almost crying by pride] Yes. Yes, I can.
Isabelle Meyers: [watching Joel getting beat up, runs toward a man in a Star Wars uniform] Help us, Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're our only hope!
Joel: [voice over] I completely forgot people beat you up in high school. When you're older, they just go behind your back and complain to Human Resources.