- Ed Ferrara: So, the pig actually eats the bacon?
- Tom Scavo: Uh, huh, yeah.
- Ed Ferrara: I don't see the client doing a happy dance over the whole cannibalism theme.
- Lynette Scavo: Well, Tom, why don't you pitch him the other idea you came up with last night. You know the one where people love bacon so much they want to keep it a secret.
- Ed Ferrara: What like a secret underground society of bacon eaters?
- Tom Scavo: More like my college fraternity, where, you know, everybody wanted in, but we only took the coolest guys.
- Ed Ferrara: You were Greek?
- Tom Scavo: Alpha Tau Omega.
- Ed Ferrara: I was Phi Kap.
- Tom Scavo: You?
- Ed Ferrara: And I don't remember you having to be that cool to pledge ATO.
- Tom Scavo: Look, if I had a nickel for every Phi Kap that I tied to a freeway sign.
- Ed Ferrara: Scavo, if you were my pledge, I would've made you my bitch.