Felicia Tilman: I'm not worried, Edie. Martha and I have a very intense bond. We were connected at the most primal level and, a few days ago, I felt this sensation in my soul. That's when it first dawned on me that something had happened to my sister, and when she didn't arrive at my home as scheduled, well... that's when I knew she was dead.
Edie Britt: Oh, honey, no. You musn't think like that. Martha's only missing.
Felicia Tilman: [in a patronizing tone] No. Edie. She's dead. But she's my sister and I'm going to find out *exactly* what happened to her.
Edie Britt: Look, Felicia, it's... natural to freak out when a loved one's missing.
Felicia Tilman: Loved one? Oh. Edie, let me be clear about this. I hated Martha. She was a wretched pig of a woman, and the day she died, this world became a better place.
Susan Mayer: [singing "New York, New York" to live piano accompaniment after just learning from neighbor Edie that she had had an indiscretion with Carl, her ex] Start spreading the news, I'm leavin' today. I wanna be a part of it, New York, New York. These vagabond shoes...
[whispers in the mike to Carl]
Susan Mayer: You're an ass, you know that?
Susan Mayer: No, keep playing.
Susan Mayer: Are longing to stray.
Susan Mayer: There's a word you know, right?
Susan Mayer: And get around the heart of it, New York, New York. I wanna...
Susan Mayer: just tell you that the affair was one thing. I mean, I forgave you because on some small level, I thought you were in love with her, and now I find out that you were just groping people at parties.
Susan Mayer: Top of the heap.
Susan Mayer: Karl, don't you turn away from me. Look at me! You know, what else were you doing during our marriage? How many other women were you sticking it to? As God is my witness, it will snow on the hills of hell before I ever feel sorry for you again!
[awkward silence in the bar; finishes song]
Susan Mayer: New York!