The Closer (TV Series)

Standards and Practices (2005)

G.W. Bailey: Louie Provenza

Photos 

Quotes 

• Brenda Leigh Johnson : And, Lieutenant Provenza...

  Louie Provenza : Yes, ma'am.

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : I need this hurried to S.I.D. in about two shakes of a lamb's tail. Thank you so very much. And keep it taped off, ladies and gentlemen. Because until we understand things better...

  Louie Provenza : [imitating Brenda, in a serious manner]  Uh, this is a crime scene, y'all.

• Louie Provenza : That's a rat?

  Det. Andy Flynn : That's his hair replacement system.

  Louie Provenza : His what?

  Det. Andy Flynn : They used to call it a toupee.

  Louie Provenza : Yeah, well, they used to call them bald, too.

• Louie Provenza : [imitating Brenda]  Lieutenant Flynn, see if this bottle has any prints on it other than the ones belongin' to our big-time Hollywood producer here. Thank yew!

  [Flynn laughs] 

  Louie Provenza : Yoo-hoo! Detective Sanchez, yoo-hoo, uh, would you ask S.I.D. to come down here for one little second. Oh, and, detective Daniels, I want to talk to the neighbor who called this in. Thank you. Lieutenant Tao, grab your abacas and see if y'all can figure out the time of death.

  [the detectives are all laughing] 

  Brenda Leigh Johnson : [appears behind him]  Thank yew, Lieutenant! Those are all excellent ideas.