Greg Sanders: That's all I got, so sorry.
Catherine Willows: Greg, never apologize for doing your job.
UnderSheriff McKeen: So, Grissom, I'm not sure of your ambitions, but if you're interested in taking on more responsibility, maybe a promotion, I'd be glad to pass...
Gil Grissom: [interrupts] You know, Oscar Wilde once said: "Ambition is the last refuge of failure." I'm fine. Thanks.
David Hodges: You remember your geology.
Catherine Willows: Yes! Actually, senior year I took "rocks for jocks", I dated the TA.
Warrick Brown: Lucky guy. I'm sure you got an "A".
Catherine Willows: As a matter of fact, I did.
David Hodges: [to Warrick] You're married? Don't flirt.
Warrick Brown: What did you talk about?
Evan Peters: All right, get this. She tried to tell me that God got her pregnant.
Evan Peters: I mean, if that's true, the big guy owes me an apology 'cause she was my girlfriend. He should have asked me first.
Gil Grissom: I just finished your eval.
Catherine Willows: And?
Gil Grissom: In the comments section, I noted that if you had my job, these evaluations wouldn't be late.
Catherine Willows: Thank you.
Catherine Willows: I don't know who killed Christina Adalian, I don't know how she got pregnant, and I don't know the identity of the baby's biological parents.
Gil Grissom: It's always good to know what you don't know.
Sara Sidle: Project Sunflower promotes itself as doing God's work.
Catherine Willows: I knew a stripper who claimed the exact same thing.
[Grissom walks in]
Henry Andrews: Why did the fly fly?
Gil Grissom: Because the spider spied her.
Gil Grissom: Catherine's daughter told me that when she was three.
UnderSheriff McKeen: What are you doing?
Gil Grissom: Circling blowflies.
UnderSheriff McKeen: Why?
Gil Grissom: 'Cause dead flies tell no lies.
[Catherine and Sara arrive at the crime scene]
Captain Jim Brass: The decedent's name is Christina Adalian, 28. Gunshot to the temple. Her sister is over there, just came in from L.A. When no one answered the door, she looked inside, saw her sister on the floor. The playpen with the baby was next to the body. Police officers kicked in the door.
[Grissom doesn't answer his phone]
Catherine Willows: Who do you keep avoiding?
Gil Grissom: Ecklie.
Catherine Willows: Ah, that means you should answer it.
Gil Grissom: No, he just wants to yell at me because I'm late with the personnel evaluations. It can wait.
Lana Adalian: [about Joey's father] I only know his first name. Evan. But Christina referred to him as "the jerk".
Sofia Curtis: Grissom, Ecklie has been looking for you. Is your cell not working?
Gil Grissom: What are you doing here?
Sofia Curtis: Well, apparently, I was a CSI, then a detective, but now I'm a messenger. You're needed at the lab ASAP.
Gil Grissom: Why?
Sofia Curtis: I have no idea. But the undersheriff's camped out in the break room.
Gil Grissom: The science in these textbooks is sound, but the tape is more than enough to get reasonable doubt.
Conrad Ecklie: Well, there's no doubt in my mind that Thayer worked his science to get the answers the defense needed.
Catherine Willows: [about Thayer] The guy's an ass.
Gil Grissom: He used to be a competent scientist. We actually co-authored a paper together 10 years ago. I believe greed has gotten in his way.
Catherine Willows: Well, I've seen him on the stand. He manipulates evidence.
Gil Grissom: He manipulates people. The public assumes that scientists are ethical, but many of us are no better than politicians, evidently.